


Cowboys & Angels

by Sonny



Series: The Trilogy [2]
Category: Queer as Folk (US)
Genre: Angst, Drama, M/M, POV Alternating, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2003-04-04
Updated: 2003-04-04
Packaged: 2017-10-13 14:24:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 22,393
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/138350
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sonny/pseuds/Sonny
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>SEQUEL to KISSING A FOOL ; Brian is still trying to envision life with this new image of Michael, but let's look at this time from Michael's POV. Can this really be love? Brian Kinney wanting a "boyfriend"?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Kris, your support will always be embraced. I strive to impress you. I hope I never fail; Paula, again, you were there for me (late in the night), despite the struggle over the "computer time" allotted for you. Your "beta" is forever appreciated :); xof... much love and respect-This one's in your honor... I wish you held classes so you could REALLY teach us a thing or two...; To my B/M Yahoo Family... I know you were wondering if this fell off the face of the Earth. Well, I found the story and posted it for you. Mooches and Hugs!!!

  


* * *

 

I have no clue to the reasoning behind why I woke up two minutes before my alarm was to go off. Blinking my eyes slowly, easing my body into waking, I lifted my head from what I had thought was a pillow. I squinted toward the clock on my night stand. The green digital numbers sunk into my sleepy mind one by one. Seven twenty-eight in the morning. Cool. I had enough time to run in for a quick shower before heading into work.

When I attempted to raise the rest of my body, to exit the bed, I realized that there was something holding me down. I swiveled my head facing behind me to discover an all too familiar splat of hair tucked up to my shoulder. Christ! Brian. Shit! Memories of what we did last night to early this morning came rushing back in my thoughts. I shut my eyes tightly hoping this was just a dream. Holy Mother of...!

Brian’s arm remained wrapped about my waist. What I had been laying my head on was his biceps. I remembered that some time during the night I had detached myself from him, finding a comfortable position on my stomach. Then in two seconds, I felt Brian follow me as he sprawled his torso to lay over my back. The moment had brought a small, silly grin to my face as I drifted off into dreamland. I learned that Brian Kinney was a cuddler... a “snuggle bug”, if you will. I’d take the knowledge to my grave, because I knew he’d only do something that unrestricted with me. The fact made me feel treasured and special.

Now that those few hours had transpired with us completely as one, I couldn’t help feeling un clean and slightly morning after. I had to escape to the bathroom in a terrible way. Sure, I could have opted to bask, practically engulfed by Brian’s sculptured body, but there was only so much I could handle. I didn’t think I’d get much of a paycheck if I stayed in bed with the aftermath of great sex on my mind. Reality reared her ugly head and she reminded me that I had offered to open the store a half-hour early so we could set up the Special Sale aisles.

With the stealth of a professional thief, I managed to raise his arm from around my hips quietly slipping out from under his warmth. Shockingly, I had forgotten that I was naked and made a sudden dash around the bedroom to grab everything I’d need to get ready for work. I tip-toed about the floor exiting efficiently while closing the door to block any additional noise that might wake up Brian. I figured, that if luck was on my side, once I finished in the shower, Brian would still be sleeping and I could slip away without having to be involved in some deep discussion about what happened between us. I didn’t know if I could face him so soon, without feeling embarrassed, or ashamed.

*********************************************************************

Brian was cold. No, he was fucking freezing, like an icicle. Only ten minutes after Michael’s disappearance he could sense the change in temperature. The silence was deafening. Something didn’t feel right. He lifted his face from the center of the fluffy pillows to glance about the room. The strange surroundings had thrown him off for a second, or two, before it registered in his brain that he wasn’t in the loft. Definitely not in his own bed. He raised his torso off the mattress rolling over to lean back on his elbows. Mikey... Dear God! What had gone on in this bed last night?

Where Michael had slept during the wee hours was laying empty now. Where in the hell...? He shot a glance to the digital clock frowning at the fluorescent numbers. Shit! He sat up to wipe the palms of his hands over his face. He wondered why Michael thought he had to sneak out in order to shower and leave for work. He didn’t even know the schedule for the rest of the week. He couldn’t even remember if he’d been told of Michael’s hours. Once the dreariness of the early morning hours settled over him, Brian was able to focus his ears to hear the soft shower spray and the awful “singing” coming from beyond the bedroom door. Someone had left the door slightly a jar. Either that or Michael was as tone deaf as a three year old child.

He climbed out of bed to walk in the direction of the bathroom utterly forgetting that there were other eyes to worry about in the slow trek outside. Luckily, there was no one in the rest of the apartment. Or anyone Brian could see physically. He reached the bathroom to find Michael attempting to match the great Aretha Franklin. He’d make a note to contact her later to tell her the career was safe. He cracked open the door to find the room flooding with steam again. He barely recognized the naked frame through the flimsy shower curtain. Inching closer to the tub while reaching out a tentative hand to pull back the material, Brian approached Michael in the manner reminiscent of the movie Psycho.

“Can anybody join in? Or is this a special invite?”

I practically jumped three feet backwards, but the tiled wall stopped me. Here came Brian forcefully invading the tiny shower space. I’d been right in the middle of shampooing, singsonging with my favorite diva. R-E-S-P... ”Shit! Brian! Give a guy fair warning! Like a knock... or a starting pistol! I’m going fuckin’ blind here... if you care!” Soapy suds were running all down my face into the lids I’d closed.

Climbing in one leg at a time, Brian settled in the tub along with Michael pulling the curtain back in place. He grabbed his wrists to stop him from irritating the soap. “I can help you with that.” Michael’s head was ducked entirely under the shower spray as Brian’s other hand held steady at the back of his neck. Michael tried to avoid the water, but ended up choking and sputtering every which way lost in uncontrolled laughter. “Feel better, Miss Thang?”

I glanced over at Brian as best I could but my eyes were still waterlogged. “Sheesh! Where’s my damn r-e-s-p-e-c-t?! Been eyeing the rare family chachkas again have we?” I teased him as I gathered what dignity I had remaining standing naked before him.

“I have my sights set on something a little more priceless.” Brian handed Michael a hand towel hanging nearby to recover his eyesight. As he watched Michael erase the blindness, he felt the need to react instinctively. The drowned, wet puppy dog look totally worked in sending spurts of pleasure to his heart. The stupid grin was back on his face. Tugging Michael closer, he attached them by the lips first, then moved his hands down to frame Michael’s shape in his grasp. Their mouths converged as one unit of energy, pulsating under the liquid cascade. The night before hadn’t quenched enough of the hunger. They became a slippery blob of arms and legs as each man reached out to hold onto some part of the shower/tub area. Brian knew he had mastered stealing Michael’s breath away. It was a most enjoyable feat.

Turning both their sopping wet forms, Brian plastered Michael against the frigid tiles. Michael bit down and began to suck on Brian’s bottom lip as he was lifted to fit his legs around Brian’s waist. Brian craved Michael’s taste like a primal urge unbound. Immediately his head was doused, momentarily pausing the kissing as he spit out the water he’d inhaled. He tilted back his head arching the mixture of fluids into a fountain in no general direction. Once he fixed his neck back, he realized his mistake.

I swiped at the liquid dripping down my cheeks. “Swell, Brian. Thanks.”

Brian loved how light Michael was in his arms as he held him to the wall. After Michael dried his face again, he shaped his arms loosely about Brian’s neck. Maybe as a safety precaution to protect himself from being dropped on his nicely round ass. “What’s on the agenda for today? Work? Play? Work and Play?” Michael didn’t reply fast enough. “Sleep? That’s a good one, too. I’ve got a few more options.”

“Actually, the list goes something like this... I’ve played, I’ve slept, I woke up, I'm showering, then I’ll dress and leave for work. Employees like when their bosses follow the steps in that order. Saves from those embarrassing days of walking into the Big Q in your underwear, or in nothing at all.” I shared a silent nod and a similar mouthed sentence of “Oh, yeah.” with Brian. “I promised to open a half-hour early today. We want to have time to set up the Three Day Special Sale merchandise that arrived on the trucks yesterday.” I knew I didn’t need to explain my job to Brian, but sometimes it eased the gruffness.

Brian stopped nodding his head in unison with Michael as he learned of the bad news. No play. No fun. He began to scrunch up his face in the midst of some random orgasmic flight. “Oh! My! God! Michael!” Every word followed a convulsion of Brian’s body. “Yeah, baby! Speak to me in retail!” Michael was losing himself in hysterical giggles. “My cock’s growing harder at the simple thought of all those burly, husky Bears sweating as they heft box after box in torn jeans and muscle shirts.”

“Sweetie, I hate to dispel the myth. More like beer bellies and polyester blend work shirts and matching pants. They do sweat, though... and some are total Bears.” I couldn’t get over the flustered look that had entered Brian’s features. “What? What’s wrong?”

“Mikey... you called me ‘Sweetie’.” Brian scowled at the romantic ideas words like that conjured up in his head.

“Oh. I’m sorry.” I frowned in sadness lowering my eyes to Brian’s chest. The word had been a simple reaction to a sudden moment of joking and teasing. I had never used a term of endearment for Brian in all the years of our friendship. And I sure didn’t know why I felt compelled to say it. Those cute nicknames were more for the Sweater-Sets of our breed. The Todds and the Blairs who frequented Mummy and Daddy’s cabin in Cape Cod.

“Hey.” Brian jostled Michael on his hips to try and refocus his gaze to his face. “Look at me.” He dipped his head to help raise Michael’s eyes. “We’ll work on it, Mikey. Come up with something that identifies us. Okay?” He noticed the silly grin returning to Michael’s mouth. “There’s really no way to get out of working today?” Brian was disappointed to miss out on spending an entire day with Michael in bed.

I stared at Brian’s gorgeous face like he’d grown a third eye. “Uh... No-wh! Like I’m gonna be able to pull one over on them calling at this late hour. Believe me, I’ve tried.”

Brian was no dummy, but he could dream. Strangely it hurt to lose the hours of a day to being apart, but looking forward to the time after work was incentive enough. “How long have we got?”

I glanced over Brian’s shoulder to the watch on my wrist. “Enough to finish the shower.”

“Then we’ll have to make the most of what we have...” Brian left the statement open to mean more then just for today. He noticed Michael staring intently at him as they were both moving under the shower nozzle. He began to wonder if they were trying to digest these new images to their relationship. No doubt Michael had always believed his best friend had the capacity for these kind of emotions. Brian knew he never bothered to think about the possibility at all. Inside and out, he thought he already was aware of everything about Michael. He had to learn his childhood friend was becoming a complete enigma to him. He almost forgot to breath when Michael reached out a wayward hand to smooth back the waves of mashed, wet hair from his forehead.

I squirmed my body further up Brian’s torso to aid in my unsteady reach for the bottle of shampoo. Despite his flare for expensive niceties, I had some idea that Brian wouldn’t mind the way my cheap dollar store brand would smell on him. I just wondered if he could bear wearing the scent all day at the office. I worked the lather in deeply to his scalp as he shut his eyes to curtail the tingling. His grip on my body was loosening under my motions, so I dropped my hands from his head. Our slick bodies squeaked and shuddered at the same time as the sensations generated between us threw us into a whirlwind. My feet landed balanced on the tub floor.

Brian ducked his hair under the spray to dissolve the suds as he worked both his hands to push back the tendrils from his eyes. He wanted to be able to watch Michael as closely as possible. He wished he could stop time, or at least slow it down.

“Turn around.” I commanded of Brian as I thought how odd it was for me to gain any control over a simple shower with my best friend... and new lover?

Brian did as requested using the wall to lean upon to allow Michael access to where he needed to begin. Starting at the nape of his neck, the washcloth scrubbed gently across the wide berth of shoulders down the curve of his spine ending at the tail bone. A massage expanded over his back as he allowed Michael free reign over any part of his body. He quietly hoped for a certain area to be next on his list. Unfortunately when Michael had chores to do, rarely did they mean whatever you damn well pleased. There was an order to follow. He was teased around the shape of his rear, the globes getting separate attention. Lord, oh, please help me!, he silently prayed. Brian squeezed his lids shut and had to put his palms flat out, along the tile to use as support.

The backs of his muscular thighs and along the knees which sloped down to the circumference of his thick calves, Michael covered every exposure. Nothing erotic or sensuous about the body washing, but Brian’s cock reacted anew just the same. He felt the subtle message from Michael to face him, but had no idea if he even knew the reaction he was churning. The enlarged organ nearly knocked him upside the head.

“Whoa! Got a license for that deadly weapon, Chief?” I chuckled at the gentle thud the tip of Brian’s hard-on made on my temple. “Watch where you point that thing, huh?” I protected my eyes with a hand as I never missed a beat by continuing the cleaning job on the front side of his delectable body. This time I began from the bottom to the top. Scrubbing tenderly up the light brown hair on his lanky, athletic legs, I found myself centering my own body around the area of his bulky thighs. Little did I realize how unsettled I was making him until he could no longer use anything but my shoulders for balance.

Christ! Brian was literally weakening with passion. He wanted release, but didn’t know how to go about making the request with Michael. “Michael...” He tried to voice the invitation, but discovered Michael had read his mind. He soaped his tiny hands to speed up the warmth as he pressed the palms to the area of Brian’s genitals working the suds into the sable curls. The lather thickened over the kinky hair, down the lengthy shaft and along the underside of his throbbing sack. His eyes rolled heavenward thanking someone for a fantasy fulfilled. He almost felt close to death. The ecstasy was so undeniable.

His hips went on automatic pumping motions as he lost himself in the moment. He craved to take possession of Michael in more ways then what they had explored last night. Fuck! He needed to be inside, sheathed in Michael as only he had mastered over his sexual past. The intense orgasmic pleasure was sweet, but going through the feeling alone was disturbing. Brian could almost cry like a baby to know Michael was so giving as a lover, to think of his partner’s delight before his own. While he quivered in the glow, Brian suffered the expert hands and masterful moves as he spilled wave after wave of his seed on the white porcelain. He quickly pulled Michael up to devour him in a forceful kiss showing him of his thankfulness.

“What was that for?” I chuckled at his breathless reaction to a simple shower with me.

Brian knew Michael didn’t really have to ask to know what he had done. His silly sacrifices. “Don’t you have to be somewhere?” He moved to turn the shower valves off.

“Shit! Yeah! Thanks! I almost forgot!” I bolted from the tub as if something was chasing me handing Brian the bar of soap, the washcloth and my dignity. I had become too engrossed in Brian. Fool!

Moving the curtain back, Brian relaxed leisurely against the tile watching Michael race to dry himself and dress in under ten minutes or less. “Let them wait, Michael. God knows you’ve kissed their collective asses enough to gain some kind of consideration. What’s a few seconds out in the cold?” The large, fluffy towel was randomly tossed in the air as Brian reached out to catch the material before it hit the dirty floor. Brian efficiently wrapped it about his trim waist allowing the seam to sweep below his belly button. He found the time to ease slowly out of the shower when Michael was just about completing his outfit for the day.

The boxers came first, but Brian had wondered why Michael hadn’t gone for a tighter fit. Sometimes you had to allow people their quirks. Then he slid on a plain white t-shirt that would darken the light texture of his button-down Oxford shirt he’d randomly selected out of the closet. His shirt would subtly match the color of his cotton trousers chosen to finish the set. A tie hung loosely from the hanger on the hook behind the door. Brian shuffled over to reach for the length of material. Michael moved to take a seat on the toilet. Closing the lid he put on his socks and slipped his feet into his comfortable, yet fashionable loafers.

Since becoming Assistant Manager, Michael didn’t have to work at the menial jobs he had to just months ago, so he had to dress to impress. His style was way off from Brian’s designer originals, but the image spoke of Michael’s character. They wanted the best things in life without having to dig through the muck of minimum wage and the middle class life that had plagued them as children. They were going to be better, and different, then their parents.

Brian felt overwhelmed by a surge of emotions stepping behind Michael as he prepared himself in the mirror, doing the basic toiletries. He rested against the wall spying him. He nearly growled to learn Michael had a quick “drive-thru” prep while hours were spent on special soaps, moisturizers and liquids to make Brian’s skin retain his looks and age during his own bathroom regimen. All the little asshole had to do was wake up. He couldn’t get over seeing him all doled out in his work clothes. Always gave him an image of a little boy playing dress up in his Daddy’s uniform. Once he reached the end of his morning ritual, Brian pushed from the tiled wall to admire Michael in the reflective view.

I noticed that Brian had been attentive to my every move while I dressed. Kind of unnerving to be watched so closely in a confined space. Hard to tell him to leave when I was easily thrilled by his intent gaze. I knew he was aroused by something that had changed between us. Why he seemed to look at me with a new pair of eyes. I reached over my shoulder for the tie, glaring at Brian in the mirror. “Is there something wrong with me?” I almost could no longer stand the sole concentration of those endearing soulful eyes on me.

Brian imagined that Michael had thought his quiet vigil of ogling him was some kind of critique. He had no way of vocalizing his sappy reason of needing to soak up all visions of Michael, permanently imprint his features in his head, for the tedious day ahead. “Not a thing.” Brian helped place the tie around Michael’s neck making sure the lengths were in the exact place.

A small grin floated above my lips as I allowed Brian his credible attempts to fix the simple tie. He wasn’t getting the perfect knot. He undid the soft silk, for a third time, before I finally decided to invade his task. “Wait.” I turned to face Brian placing my backside on the edge of the sink. I had to find a comfortable position squished between the rock-hard flesh and the cool marble ledge. The meshing of clothes, towels and our burning bodies drove us to ponder other mornings that might begin this way. “Here... try from this direction.” I kept my head bent to eye his trembling hands as they started again. I felt the glare of Brian above me.

The perfect knot was completed as Brian stared at the top of Michael’s head. The raven spikes brushed his nose smelling of musky scented gel. His once nervous fingers ended the process as if they’d done the move for years. “There.” The knot was shuffled closer to his throat. “Now you’re ready.” Brian placed a light peck to the tip of Michael’s nose and he saw the deep wish that things would go further.

I rubbed my hands under Brian’s biceps, loving the feel of the tight muscles. There was tension generating that I wanted to relieve. “Not quite. I’m getting there, then I’ll be out of your hair.” I decided that I had to grab for what I wanted or Brian would let the things slip away. My hands went up to grasp the sides of Brian’s face to draw him down to my lips as I bit at him, succulently slipping him the tongue ever so secretly. He never knew what hit him as I shot out of his arms to venture out in to the apartment to gather the rest of my things. Pocket things. Easy things. Wallet, keys, loose change and my name badge.

Brian followed taking tentative steps out in the living room as he moved to take a seat on the sofa. He leaned back to relax along the pillow back cushion. He wondered that if he didn’t speak up Michael may leave without saying goodbye. “Hey!”

I paused in the mid-frantic scramble to exit to see Brian crook his finger over his head in the air toward my direction. What now?!

“C’mere.”

“Brian, I need to leave... like two minutes ago... so unless you plan on driving me to work in that towel, spit it out.” I knew exactly what would happen if I stepped anywhere near him.

“Tell them traffic was hectic. Come the fuck over here, Michael.” Brian’s voice dropped an octave in a hushed command as he added a gesture with his head.

“Shit!” I mumbled a few silent obscenities under my breath as I walked to face Brian like a child trying to avoid punishment. I stood my ground, arms crossed over my billowing chest. “What!?” When I was close enough Brian latched onto my hips dragging me over to fit between his legs as he sat forward on the sofa. His face met the center of my chest. His hazel pupils dilated as he looked up at me through his lashes. Such a hungry look for early in the morning.

The crisp trousers were beginning to soak up Michael’s heat. Brian wanted to touch the naked skin beneath, but time was evasive. He smelled an awful lot like an old friend of his, but right now the scent was sending him in circles. “I want to give you something before you leave. Get you through the big, tough day ahead.” The way he spoke would draw different conclusions in both their minds.

My hands went instinctively to the crotch area of my pants. “I don’t have that kind of time. Off limits... for now. Bad doggy! Stay!”

Brian couldn’t stop the laughing fit Michael sent him in as he went to stand above his small frame. He stepped back, cautiously, unsure of Brian’s motives. An inquisitive eyebrow rose as he grabbed Michael’s delicate elbows rendering him weak and pulled him tight flush with his body. Both arms went up, down and over Michael’s shoulders as he reached a hand to cup the back of the black hair. He inhaled Michael at the inch of space between their faces as he dipped slightly, placing a kiss to his shocked cooling lips. Michael was released only a few seconds later. “Have a good day at work.” All Brian had wanted to do was send him off.

I was disappointed. “That’s it?”

Brian shrugged one shoulder. “What time do you have?”

I squinted my face at him. “How cruel can you be?!” Another stupid grin escaped as I felt my cheeks redden. “Uh... can you hold that thought until later?”

Brian nodded his head slowly while sending Michael signals of sadness at his exiting. “Much later.” He mumbled, trying to drink in the last sight of Michael on his way to the door.

I was almost at the doorknob when I turned to say over my back. “I’ll give you a buzz, say around lunch. We’ll make plans for tonight.”

Brian couldn’t stop the meager enthusiasm from pouring forth. “Sure. Can’t wait.” He was bummed. He crawled back onto the sofa, face first so he didn’t have to witness the departure. Brian lifted a hand in the air to show a courteous wave. It looked lame and weak... and very gay. He stuffed a pillow over his head to cover the silent close of the door. Christ!

I hesitated in the middle of the doorway looking at Brian as he sank into the sofa. “Okay. G’bye, then.” And that was that. I was a little perturbed that I hadn’t gotten a more seductive, romantic send off, but then look who I was leaving. Jesus!

“Right back at ya’!” Brian bellowed into the cushions as the door shut permanently. In the span of two seconds, he felt bereft of Michael’s essence. His “light” was gone, extinguished. The perpetual smiles had disappeared, as well. He had no desire to do anything, but vegetate right where he lay. A night of little sleep was catching up to him. He was tired. Relaxing for a few minutes, Brian pondered what to do. His deepest want as of that second was to crawl back in Michael’s bed and wait, patiently as he could. But not one muscle moved and that could become a real problem.

*********************************************************************

I had nearly made it to the stairs. Honestly, I tried to make the effort. I’d gotten to the end of the hall before the urge to return hit me like a sucker punch. I had to go back. Inserting my keys back in the door, I opened the wood paneling to find that Brian was passed out face down on the sofa. I smiled at his pose. I was prepared to knock his socks off, if he had been wearing any. As if hearing some random noise, Brian lifted his head from under the large down pillow. Swiveling his neck to find me standing only a few feet away, he stood to his six foot height. This time he crossed arms over his chest in a challenge stance. I had rushed out so fast I knew I would have a difficult time explaining why I was back.

“Back so soon?” Brian felt his heart speed up. What was about to happen next?

“You’re a hard man to leave. I didn’t do the ‘goodbye’ justice.” I took the next steps toward him one at a time as I put out a palm to land on his bare chest. I pushed him back once. Then I pushed him back a second time but a little more forcefully which caused him to lose his balance and fall butt first onto the sofa, nearly landing on the floor. He widened his arms to grab for any part of the cushions. “Forgive me?” He adjusted his body to sit straighter, his back upright as I placed my hands on either side of his head as he lay back looking up at me. I huddled close to his face pressing a kiss, first to his moist forehead.

“Practice does make perfect. I say... give it your best shot.” Brian left his body wide open for anything that was on Michael’s agenda.

In my perfectly pressed trousers and clean shirt, I effortlessly straddled Brian pressing our bodies closer. Finally I could look down into his face, for a change. I could savor every beautiful inch of his face as he stared at me with a deep need. I giggled lightly as I plopped one smooch to his mouth, immediately letting go once our mouths had suckled enough.

Brian looked at his friend as he had expected a much lengthier time frame. “Uh, let me mull that over for awhile. I may need incent-...” Brian never got to finish his comment as Michael took control of the moment. Damn, but he was sweet and sexy!

I decided I had enough of his smart mouth. The next one was sloppy, wet and added warm-gooeyness to our insides. I have to admit that it was more tongue then I could handle, but for the time being it was perfect. I ended our lip battle by slowly starting to place a peck along Brian’s skin, after each word, to punctuate.

“I have...” **KISS!** “... to go!” **KISS!** “I have...” **KISS!** “... the store keys!” **KISS!**

Brian wanted to play. **KISS!** “Yeah!” **KISS!** “What a...” **KISS!** “... bitch!” **KISS!**

“Tragedy!” **KISS!** “All those employees!” **KISS!** “Weather’s colder!” **KISS!** “Customers!” **KISS!**

“Damn shame!” **KISS!**

 ****

 **KISS!**

 ****

“I’ll...”

 ****

 **KISS!**

 ****

"... hold...”

 ****

 **KISS!**

 ****

“... back...”

 ****

 **KISS!**

 ****

“... my...”

 ****

 **KISS!**

 ****

“... tears!”

 ****

 **KISS!**

 ****

“Appreciate...” **KISS!** “... the effort!” **KISS! KISS! KISS!**... I placed a final one back where I had begun my trek across Brian’s face and neck. I didn’t dare go too far south. We were both prepared to go further, but my time was truly growing limited. Overheated and panting, I had to stop or die. My hands trailed down his stacked abs to reach the seam of the towel where his erection lay underneath. “Sorry to leave you in such a state of... distress. Promise if you can wait for tonight, I’ll be sure to... uh, give you, and anything else that needs it, my undivided attention.”

“Promises, promises.” Brian snatched for the hand floating downward toward where there was no trespassing. At least not yet. “I’ll try to remind you of your promise and be swift with punishment should I be utterly devastated by your forgetfulness.”

“Bye.” This time the leaving was more difficult. I couldn’t help myself. I delicately shaped his wonderful, gorgeous features in my hands. My thumbs moved to sculpt his full, pouting moist lips. He bit down on the tips in a playful mood. I climbed off of him fully “lost” in his gaze. Christ, I couldn’t bear to let him go. What was wrong with me?

What the hell was wrong with him? Brian swallowed past the lump in his throat as he felt his soul fall under the rapture of Michael’s shimmering stare. His heart was aching like a fucking sissy! For one minute he thought his heart had stopped as he watched Michael exit a second time. “Bye.” He could barely hear his own voice as he saw Michael leave backwards out the door. As the door shut, Brian fell back down to the sofa and relaxed on the cushions. He crossed his arms up over his head hoping to block out these fantastic new images approaching him. They refused to go back. Pandora’s box had been opened allowing nice, tiny emotions to slink out. Like a complicated map that can never be folded back neatly the same way, neither of them would be able to deny these overwhelming feelings pouring out. Jesus! The day would just go on forever! Christ!

~~TBC...


	2. Chapter 2

  
** LATE EVENING **

I could see him from where I was perched. I think he knew that fact, as well. He’s mesmerizing to watch. So fucking hot! Primal and glorious in his element. Babylon’s dance floor. My mouth is practically salivating as I contemplate his every move. When he dances, it’s all about his body, especially around the pelvic region. He knows how to manipulate his partners. Making them feel like he wants them, right there on the floor. Minutes ago he was slouched over the bar, nursing a brewskie while eyeballing all the flesh fiends vying for his company. Every man wants the same thing from him. They try to cover their moves by ordering a drink, some pretend to bump his hip, or butt and then there are the blatant ones who press their sweaty, well-toned bodies right on his backside. Brian’s wearing my favorite pair of tight leather pants. He’s got an admirable ass and I’m not the only one who notices.

I can spot them from a mile away and wonder if Brian’s been able to see them just as easily. They slip him their number, or e-mail address, while whispering something witty as they accomplish this great feat. I’m not impressed with tonight’s bunch. Actually they’re pretty pathetic. Brian’s not fazed once. His usual look of instant disinterest was planted the minute he walked through the doorway. Except there’s an added step to his actions as he has chucked every card, or paper, handed to him into a nearby half-full glass sitting next to him.

Brian is a legend in Babylon’s recent history. The running joke is “Who hasn’t had Brian Kinney?”

Answer? Me. Michael Charles Novotny. That is until last night. I couldn’t even grasp my head around what went on during those wee hours. My one time dream/fantasy rolled out in front of me. Out of the blue. I was a combination of emotions. One, I was scared. Brian had the patience of a gnat. He’d rather take three flights of stairs then wait for an elevator, what chance did I have in him not being able to wait for me? Two, I was happy. Stupidly giddy, if the term was believed. I’m not the most gorgeous, sexy morsel in the meat market, so I had to grab opportunities when they landed in my lap. Three, I wasn’t sure any of this was real, or that it had been an actual fact. Brian had given me nothing to sink my teeth into saying he was mine. I didn’t ask it of him, but secretly wished he’d feel trustworthy enough to release himself to me. Like I would to him, if he asked it of me. Was the only commitment from Brian going to be under friendship terms? After last night, somehow I couldn’t see that as being true any longer.

Brian is a master. An enigma to behold. I’ve known him half of my life, but he still finds ways to perplex and frustrate me. Being friends since junior high has given me a rare insight into the different facets that make him who he is, or who people see him as or how he wants people to think of him. Brian could care less. I suppose that’s one of the reason I fell in love with him. His unabashed courage. His “whatTheFuck?”-attitude. I’m too chicken shit to confront my own mother about meddling in my life and being ultra supportive of my sexuality. Often I enjoyed living vicariously through him.

I couldn’t tell you the exact moment my friendship adoration turned into a man’s love. One day I had looked at him and thought how wonderful it would be to grow old by his side. I didn’t want memories and special keepsake moments with him; I wanted to build a life with him where we would love each other as normal straight couples did. Having to describe the feelings I have for Brian in detail would entail a massive resource book. For sixteen years they had been safely tucked from sight deep in my heart. It was easier then having to explain the pathetic waste my life had become. The love I had for Brian was something I couldn’t loosen out of me, with a snap of the fingers. He was rooted into my soul. To be honest, I didn’t ever want to let him go.

This became difficult when Brian pushed me away to find solace in other mens’ arms. When we were younger I had thought mine were strong enough. He’d been comforted by me so often, I thought nothing could come between us. Until he learned how using strange men for sexual purposes helped him survive the next chapter of his life. The life without me. So I decided to crawl back into my shell and deal with my own silly feelings. That’s when I found myself seeking what I wanted with Brian with the men in my own life.

I thought I had been given a reprieve when David came into my world. Perfection personified and in a very gorgeous package. One of the Beautiful People desired me. David was a Fantasy Dream Lover who fit every item in my boyfriend profile. Sometimes, though, perfection became a little overrated and people’s true natures surfaced. I began to grow annoyed with David the more limitations I was given, especially when it came to my relationship with Brian. He never understood our friendship and why I couldn’t just drop my life with Brian. David wanted sole possession of me.

He had reached a point when he needed to know how much I was willing to sacrifice for the budding relationship between us. I was delivered the ultimatum. Live with me and be my boyfriend/lover or forget you ever met me. Not much room to think, there. Live under your rules, in your house and be with only you while I just allow my own sense of self fall by the wayside. Cage or freedom? Tough decision.

My odd attachment to Brian usually became a hindrance to making a life on my own. When I had chosen to back off from David’s invitation, he thought he knew the real reason. What he didn’t know was Brian had no true influence over me. I did have a brain of my own. No one wanted to listen. Why was it difficult for people to understand how afraid I was? I wanted to weigh my options and be certain moving in with David was the right thing to do. Instead I had gotten flack for not being spontaneous and taking a chance on the Great Catch building a life with him away from Brian.

As I looked back on what I had begun with David, I remembered hearing all the special things David wanted to experience with me. The places to visit, the food to taste, the wines to drink and the smelly cheeses to gobble down, but all that shit was planned too far in the future. Experience the world under his watchful eye. He wanted to show me there was more to existing beyond The Pitts. Where would I have found the time? The Big Q didn’t necessarily allow much vacation time to employees, no matter their station. I was a new manager to boot.

What the hell was David thinking? Oh, wait a minute, maybe he had mistaken me for someone who could just drop all responsibilities and soak up the attention. Is that love? Or suffocation? I feared becoming the type of person I had no desire of being as a gay man. Another man’s kept lover. Feed me, clothe me, pay me an allowance then be sure to kick me in the ass for being so shallow. Lordy, I was such a dunderhead.

Brian was the only person in my life willing to give it to me like it was. No bullshitting. He gave his crappy advice. Wouldn’t do me any good because my last name wasn’t Kinney. Something always worried me about my friendship with him. Why me? I wasn’t sexy, I was an okay dancer, I was in good health, still had all my teeth, had a cool family, but what did he see in me? What’s been his drive for staying my friend? I did know of one reason why, but the issue wasn’t that spectacular compared to a great fuck in bed.

I made Brian feel at ease and comforted, like he didn’t have to “be” anything more then himself. I didn’t fall for the attitude, the negativity or the constant ridicule of life in general. I gave him a place to call home and shelter when he thought the mean nasty world was out to get him. And boy have I had my share of glimpses into the reality of Brian’s life. His real self was scarey. My heart aches for him each moment I look into those hazel eyes that hold way too much history in them. I’m blown away by the raw emotions laying within. At times, they leave me breathless and on the verge of tears. I’m pleased he’s made such a success of his life beyond his past. My one worry was that using this facade was all a ruse for a drastically darker and more menacing issue beneath his soul. His sex life was a perfect example.

Usually, I was enthralled in his mastery of men and watching him score was a thrill. Tonight was different. I am part of the nameless, faceless bevy of men passing through his existence. Secretly, I wanted last night to be something that had meant a lot to both of us. Like I said, Brian didn’t pull or push me away. There’s no way I could tell...

********************************************

When I had gotten the nerve up to phone him after work, he sounded just like he always did... bothered. As if another night out on Liberty Avenue was beneath him. We met up at the Diner, our usual booth available to us. What hurt me the most was when Brian scooted into the bench next to Emmett. I had to suffer eating beside Ted, although I was across from Brian. He continued to try and avoid hitting my knees and legs as much as possible.

This was a problem, if he chose not to sit up slouching like some lazy bum. It made me squish my own body up as high as I could on the seat. Then came the casual way Brian looked about him, never once connecting with my eyes. What was going on?, I wondered. Woody’s hadn’t been great, either. All Brian did was play pool and nurse a beer. Still they’d come in droves. Some naked to the waist and perky nipples heading right for Brian. Brushing past him as he tried for another shot with his pool stick. Every one of them had been dismissed.

I planned on staying away from the pool table, so as to avoid having to see those very things, but my eyes kept wavering. Really, I was interested to see another rejection, but I couldn’t watch the scene unfold. The second cheer that went up in the air had made Emmett and I turn our heads immediately to where Brian and Ted had been playing for over an hour.

Brian headed toward Michael with his leather jacket in hand. “Come on. Let’s get outta here.” He practically yanked the arm out of its socket as he half dragged Michael from the table.

I could barely get a taste of the foam in the glass when I felt the pull to exit. “Christ! Brian! Give me a fucking minute!” I only had enough time to make a frantic grab for my own coat on the back of my chair. “See ya!” I waved to Emmett and Ted as I followed the Leader out the door.

Ted was smiling so brightly as he sauntered over to Emmett. “I can’t believe it. I won again! I’m just utterly shocked. Somebody pinch me!” Ted should have known better then to speak so loud in a gay bar. “Ow-ch!” His stupid grin never faltered once. “I don’t care! I finally won against the great Brian Kinney!”

Emmett patted the arm of his best friend pretending to be interested in what had been proclaimed. His eyes, and head, had been too busy watching Brian and Michael. Something was going on with that Kinney man. He had been extra-crispy nasty to all who approached him. Tugging an enthusiastically giddy Ted behind him, Emmett made to exit through the way the other men had. As they went down the front stairs, Emmett was shocked to find no trace of the rest of their group. Where could they have gone so fast?

“Do you mind telling me where we’re going?” I didn’t mind hand holding with Brian, but when I was being forced to keep up with his long stride at seventy-five miles per hour, the problem became keeping my balance.

“Babylon. Where else?” Brian mumbled down the long stretch of Liberty Avenue.

I had walked down this street enough times to know Babylon was further then this and in the other direction. “Really.” He tugged me again which brought me up to smack my front to his back. I was just beginning to set my jacket over my shoulders. “Is this a short cut?”

“Sort of.” Brian found the area he’d been looking out for. Dark, secluded and away from wandering eyes. He stopped at the entrance as he turned to see how far they were from any other pedestrian traffic. He was trying to gather his breathing under control, which hadn’t been easy. He went for Michael’s forearms and slowly walked him backwards to enter the mysterious place.

I was curious to what he planned on doing. Why we had to walk so far from our usual haunts. “What’s going on, Brian? Why are we...?” I should’ve just shut up. My back found the brick wall and Brian met his lips to mine in a bone shattering kiss. I felt him latch on to my hair yanking me to and fro to allow better access to my mouth. I surrendered to him knowing that even in the night, in a dark alley, Brian would keep me safe. I heard a groan escape my lips as he took a final breath from me.

Brian leaned his forehead to Michael’s frowning one. “I couldn’t stand it anymore. I’m not good with this waiting.” Their heavy breathing and petting churned the feelings that had arisen since last night. “Pretending nothing has changed.”

“Who said you had to? I sure as hell didn’t.” I tried to rub my face against him in order for Brian to know I was here, always, right where I’d been for years.

Closing his eyes, Brian tried to encompass, in only a few words, how his day had gone on without Michael. “I thought about you every minute at work. Cynthia had to break my concentration on a few occasions during the meetings. I’m not used to being this preoccupied with one man, Michael.” He sounded like he wanted advice on how to rid himself of the problem.

I couldn’t help the sly grin from passing my lips. “Welcome to my world. Pitiful, isn’t it?”

Lifting his head off of Michael, Brian looked down into those familiar chocolate brown irises. “No, actually, it’s kind of sweet and exciting.” His hand trailed down to pull Michael’s pelvis to align with his hips. “You’re a hard man to forget.” His full lips hung over Michael’s smiling ones as he breathed into his face. “I don’t know if I can do Babylon tonight.”

“Why not? What’s wrong?” I was concerned by his determination to stay away from Babylon. Actually I was curious because Brian and Babylon were a pair. Like breathing to live. Brian never failed to find his “groove” within the tri-colored walls. On more then one night, hot, well-oiled muscular men could be his for the taking. His answer would definitely surprise me if I was reading his eyes right.

Brian didn’t feel right being sarcastic, or funny, as he gazed into Michael’s eyes. “I don’t feel like sharing you with anybody else.” His eyes flashed an earnest look that sent Michael into silence. “I want you all to myself.”

I shook my head at the unbelievable predicament I found myself in. Brian wanted me, again. Last night hadn’t been enough. Was that supposed to keep me feeling optimistic? “And going to Babylon for a few hours will deter you from doing what with me?” I wanted him to admit a few things, but was unwilling to ask outright.

Brian hung his head and broke his contact from Michael as he realized there would be no way for him to sound honest in his feelings. He didn’t want to go to Babylon, because Michael would be taken from him two seconds after they entered. Brian already knew who he wanted to go home with, but he wasn’t sure Michael was on the same page. “Fine. Let’s go back then.” He turned away from Michael and moved a few feet back. He chucked his head in the direction of Babylon. “Come on. It’ll be warmer inside.”

I was floored by the coolness being sent in my direction. “What about...?”

Brian placed his hands on his hips in frustration. “What about what, Michael? You want to go, then hurry the fuck up.”

“Oh-Kay!” Somehow in the middle of all our resurgence of the feelings from last night, I had hurt Brian by not telling him to take me somewhere where we could really be truly alone. I did want that very thing, but what was on my mind was how secretive Brian was becoming about us. Dragging me down a strange, faraway alley for a kiss and a dry hump? Was he ashamed of us as lovers? I pushed my body off the cold wall and tucked my freezing hands into my coat pockets. I walked up to Brian’s side hoping he would get over his grumpy attitude before the night was done. Couldn’t we still have our time at Babylon and then go home, alone, together?

****************************************  
 **STILL... LATE EVENING...**

Apparently not. My answer was staring at me on the dance floor. He’s moved from the bar, away from all the approaching prospects. I think the music has infiltrated his mind as he skipped to the basement of Babylon. His second home. He has taken an enhancer, some kind of party drug where he’s unable to feel anything but the beat of his own heart. I hate watching him do this because I know I could have just as easily walked up to him and been the good friend I always would be. But there were times I wasn’t able to be there and those were my most frightened moments. Times I had to depend on his old memories not overcoming his addled brain and his sorrows surfacing. Moments I knew he planned on inflicting some kind of pain, or harm, to himself.

Brian’s been dancing solo for only a few minutes. His eyes are closed and he’s moving his supple body through each calculated motion to the rhythm. His head rolls from side to side and he’s allowed his neck muscles to be exposed. One hand has begun to explore his own body, like an imaginary lover creeping across his flesh. He’s become a spectacle to behold as every man has turned to watch him get lost in some freakish fantasy. I’m entranced only because Brian’s beautiful to look at especially when he’s alone. The second a buffed Jock pulled up behind him, helping him sculpt his willowy build, I could no longer pay him any attention. He could handle himself.

Brian Kinney had been mine for a few precious hours. He’d come back for more even after the light of day. He still refused to tell me what he really wanted from me, which I was more then willing to tell him everything in my heart. Fuck! I was such a coward! If I wanted to impress myself I’d bolt down the stairs, bum-rush the Jock and grab Brian to my body kissing him openly in front of every man at the club. They would know that Brian Kinney was finally off limits. Mine. But I couldn’t move one muscle... sad and pathetic... that’s me.

I wanted to turn back to hang over the railing, but that would mean having to see Brian. I wasn’t quite ready to witness another heartbreak. I pushed off the pole intending to make my way through the throng of bodies. I had kept my head down contemplating what I would do tonight should Brian ditch me when I was literally sent spiraling down on my ass by a body coming at me. Strong hands grabbed for my biceps as they settled me on my feet. I scrunched my body tightly to compact it for safety should I fall, but I was secured. “Thanks.” I smiled awkwardly not knowing who I had collided with.

“Wow! Hello, Michael. You look...”

That voice. The scent. I raised my head to discover a familiar pair of piercing green eyes I had died a few times in years ago. “Gil.” Where was a good cape when you needed one? “How has life been treating you?”

Gil’s gaze moved up and down Michael’s perfectly fit form. “As well as it’s been to you. You look even more amazing then the last time I saw you.”

I hated being reminded of how completely lame my life had been. Another Beautiful Man who gave me little or nothing in reciprocation of my deep feelings. Brian had been away at college when I met Gil. He’d become Brian’s replacement, of sorts. The center of my world. I thought he’d loved me just as much. Only, after months of supporting his nomadic life and giving him the best days of my life, he’d run back to his on-again-off-again boyfriend, Laurence. And apparently had been running back on more occasions then he had been willing to admit. I’d just fallen too hard and too fast.

Strangely, I did feel I owed a certain amount of kindness to the happier moments he’d been able to share with me. I would always wish Gil the best, but far away from me. Except, tonight, he looked in need of a friend. A tiny part of me was pleased to see him this torn apart. “Thanks, I guess. It was nice to see you.” I tried to move beyond him, but there was a sudden grip of my forearm.

“Wait, Mike... can I...” Gil couldn’t get out the words he wanted to say to Michael. The too- little-too-late apologies seemed lost.

“What is it?” I became proud of having gotten over Gil. Despite looking gorgeous, as ever, there was a certain ugliness to him that immediately turned me off. I wouldn’t be drawn back into his world.

“I know you heard this, like a billion times before, but Laurie and I broke up. Called it quits... kinda final. About a week ago he kicked me out for good, left all my stuff laying in the driveway. Changed all the locks, too. I’m pretty much living out of matching luggage. I never knew I had accumulated so much shit until I had to store everything in some crappy, rinky-dink storage shack.” Gil smirked as he wondered if Michael might be hiding some pleasure at the turn of events. If so, he never showed it.

“Sounds bad. You got a place to stay, at least?” My question wasn’t an offer. I wanted to walk away, but I had to remind myself not to be rude. That would bring me to the level of all the Brians and Gils of this world. I wanted to be different.

“I have a cool boss who lets me stay in the building. Sometimes I stay with my sister, but she’s got a bunch of munchkins that are a real handful. I’ll babysit when I can stand them. Also have a cousin who’s about my age. We’re pretty close.” Gil moved toward Michael intent on creating a shorter distance between them to scream across from. “I appreciate you asking. The way things ended... I can’t believe how nice you’re being.” He chuckled lightly giving Michael another once over. “I was almost on my way out. Are you here alone?”

Could I do it? Was I comfortable enough to use Brian as my shield? I shook my head slowly. “No”

Gil dipped his head to hit the area around Michael’s ear. “That’s a shame. I always thought you were hot.” As he pulled back, the soft curls of his impeccably coiffed blond mane rubbed a delicate pattern across Michael’s jaw.

I wondered if Gil had meant to rekindle my interest in him with the light compliment. Brian was a different story, with Gil, I could be a rock. “Was there some other reason you needed to talk to me?” I was pushing for the second I could face the back of him, but a small part of my mind wanted to know.

“I completely understand why you’re still angry.” Gil kept his head bowed in shame, knowing full well he was being given too kind of a treatment from this tender heart he’d stepped all over. Michael was a stronger, and bigger, man then he’d ever thought.

“No kidding! Really?! That’s fucking big of you. Would have been nice to hear way back when. You know, before you dropped me like yesterday’s garbage.” I was enraged by his come-hither looks and his nonchalant attitude concerning me. I hated feeling this intense heat emanating off his compact form as he continued to stand close. How gallant of him to think of me now, right this second. I had always found it funny how when you were crazy in love with someone, once they broke up with you, all your time’s spent wanting and aching to be with that person at any cost. Once you’ve surpassed the pain, your life coming back to some equilibrium you don’t even want to hear his name, know that he’s still alive, much less in your immediate vicinity.

“I always knew that what I had done to you was wrong. I hated you thinking that I had meant to use you the entire time we were together. I didn’t expect you to fall so hard. Laurie and I...”

Weird thing about Gil was, though he might be beautiful to look at, there wasn’t much going on in his mind to reason that he should shut-up and “get the net”. I never knew that about him until I grew to despise him. “Exactly! You and Laurie, Laurence and you. Not me, and thank God not anyone clueless enough to believe the ooze that comes out of your mouth.” I had to make some space between Gil and I or I would implode, or kick him in the nuts. I was facing my ex-whatever directly without my tail between my legs. “You really need to take a breather from the scene, Gil. Give yourself some time to heal, step back and take inventory of the way you’ve decided to live under others instead of by yourself. It’s royally fucked up and deranged! Not only for you, but anyone else you involve. Rewind your mind, think about what you lost with Laurence and grieve properly. Christ, last thing you need is to do something desperate, rejecting and dismissing feelings you still have for him.”

Gil laughed weakly and immediately dropped the entire “gigolo” persona. “How can you read me so well? And be kind about telling me off?”

“I was raised by a single mother with balls of steel and the size of Jupiter. She’s got a heart of gold. Taught me that shitty people deserve a second chance, even a third and a fourth. Chalk this up to my good deed for the day. I earned a boy scout merit badge for the month.”

Suddenly, Gil began to straighten his spine, crossing his arms over his chest. “I don’t know, Mike. I always thought he’d be there. When he turned me out, changed the locks and left me with barely the clothes on my back... I thought I would collapse right on the driveway.” He became lost in his thoughts. “I heard, through the grapevine, that Laurie’s been going to a support group. I think he’s seeing someone from there. That’s what some friends have told me.”

“I say, good for Laurence. At least one of you has your head screwed on right.” About time Gil had a taste of what being a loser was like. Maybe Laurence had finally been disgusted and wanted to be the one who cheated this time.

Looking at Michael from the corner of his eye, Gil plopped a tiny grin on his lips. “I can’t help but feel you think I got taken down a peg or two, Mike.”

That cocky smirk reminded me of Brian so much that my heart flipped and ached for a chance to see him. Shit, I was a basket case, for sure. I shrugged feeling nothing for Gil as he spoke. “Some satisfaction, but I don’t ever wish pain on my worst enemies. A waste of energy. I do wish you the best, though. And I hope one day you’ll meet the one who’s your equal and makes you happy.” Ugh! I couldn’t take being this soggy, sweet to Gil. Had my sarcasm leaked through?

“My equal was Laurie.” There was an intense sadness that overtook Gil’s arresting features that struck a familiar chord.

Oh, crud! I had only meant to lay a comforting hand upon his shoulder, but the second he caught sight of my arm raising Gil ducked his head heavily on my shoulder. Jesus, he pulled me closer crying softly into my shirt while I tried to find a safety zone to touch. These past two nights I had made two men cry, and none of them had been Brian. I was almost wary of growing a complex.

***********************************

Brian had been innocently moving his body on the dance floor when these greasy arms came around him, hoping to help in some way. Earlier he’d noticed the Jock in the basement, getting blown by some blond twink and letting another, possibly the twink’s twin, suck on his nipples. The Jock was pleased to have an audience, but Brian was repulsed. Ugh! Was that what he had to look forward to if he went further down?

Brian found a secluded corner, away form watching eyes while he slipped the white pill under his tongue. He could still hear the pulse of the music at this level. He wanted to be transported somewhere else. Somewhere he could empty his mind of all those confusing thoughts about Michael. Shit, in truth, what he wanted more then anything was to be somewhere else with Michael.

Images of his friend floated in his hazed mind like a movie unfolding. Pictures after pictures of Michael and him, smiling and laughing, being together and enjoying each other’s company. The teasing the ribbing, the dirty jokes... the kissing, the forehead meshing and the close contact of their bodies... and the flashes of what happened last night. The incredible heights where Michael had taken him and the joined orgasm they had shared later in the morning hours. Finally the next morning when he’d had the most intense shower he’d experienced since the gym coach in junior high. Ending with the sweet, intoxicating goodbye before they broke to begin their day without each other.

After sensual thoughts of himself and Michael, Brian found he needed a release. Somewhere he could hide his flighty emotions. Alone in the darkness, shut behind a bathroom stall door, Brian unzipped his fly to reach inside. He allowed the flaps to hang open letting the cool air of the basement at Babylon touch his heated flesh. He’d gone without underwear, so his pleasure would be easily sated, however he wanted to carry the plan out. His engorged length was scorching to touch, like ignited coal. He nearly came in his own hand, he’d been stimulated for so long.

Reaching up to push the end seam of his button shirt to expose his upper torso, Brian set about rubbing and smoothing his own skin. He needed his fingers to be Michael’s fingers, in his mind they were. He wanted to hear, and sense, the gentle warm breaths all over his body. Feel the pink tongue licking down his straining neck. The soft lips biting and nipping at his veins. He remembered what Michael’s cock felt like in his grasp and how they merged themselves into one. He pulled and stretched the loose flesh, finding a slow rhythm that mimicked recent memories. He was exploding right at the same exact moment. His scream of release was lost in the throws of all the other random noises. His hands went out to hold himself upright. Immediately his eyes opened to discover he was sadly disappointed to not having Michael be in front of him.

Christ, the vision had been so real! He could still see the Jock who’d jacked off about a billion more times then his one gigantic orgasm. This was creeping him out. Maybe Michael had enough of the club and they could go home. Zipping himself up as fast as he could and jiggling to set his body to rights, Brian took the stairs two at a time.

Michael had never come down from his perch. Brian could still spot him crowd watching so high up in the air. Was there any way to make him come down? Even for a small dance? He went to the dance floor. Picking up a rhythm only he could feel, Brian moved onto the floor allowing the drug he’d taken to finally set in his body chemistry. This time he didn’t want to forget anything or sneak off into seclusion. He wanted to be seen. He didn’t mind all the other eyes on him. As long as the pair of fine chocolate brown ones watched him from high above. He knew he was gathering an audience of admirers. Some even tried to reach out and feel his body as he swayed, his bones and muscles loosening with each step. He liked surrendering to the music. It made him in touch with his body and what was around him. He kept opening and closing his eyes to be sure he was still keeping balance on the ground. Gravity hadn’t won and he could handle the mood enhancer he’d taken.

When he was completely feeling the groove of a particular blend of beats and breaks, Brian sensed the intrusion of someone else. The Jock from the basement. Ick! Blech! The greasy, bulging arms came around his body a step at a time. That wasn’t the only thing bulging! Brian could feel the heightened groin bump his backside. Christ! It felt like someone had doused him with cold water. He didn’t want to be rude and kick the Jock to the curb, so he just shook the bangs out of his line of vision hoping to spot a familiar face. He zeroed in on Emmett, spiraling near one of the staircases. He easily looped his trim frame out from under the Jock to make his way over.

Emmett never knew what hit him as Brian swooped down to pick him up and tucked his head near his ear. “What the fuck?!” He giggled and squealed to make sure Brian wasn’t gonna body slam him on the floor. How angry was he for opening up the door for him and Michael to move through their deep feelings for each other? “Kinney, if you so much as...”

”Is he looking?” Brian was supporting Emmett’s light, muscular form in his two hands.

Emmett rested his arms on Brian’s shoulders looking about the floor for any eyes looking puppy-doggish toward him. “Who? Cro-Magnon Man? He’s got a new boyfriend, honey. He’s no longer interested. Put me down or I’m gonna puke, Brian!” He’d had too many sweet drinks tonight.

Brian rolled his eyes heavenward as he set Emmett back down pushing them off the floor to head toward where Ted was in the darkness contemplating another prospective rejection. “Where’s Michael?” He did know this already, but wondered if the boys knew anything different.

Ted look about the Babylon scene, up, down and all around. “Last time we saw him...” Something drew Ted’s eyes to being speechless. “Well, fuck me!” Again, Ted forgot where he was raising his voice.

From up above on the stairs came a deep voice. “Anytime, sweetness! How ‘bout right now!”

Emmett made a rude face as he turned his head to decline. “No thanks!” He was more interested in seeing what had spooked Ted. “Where?” He followed Ted’s gaze to the raised floor where they spotted Michael and a very familiar face cuddled close to their friend’s shoulder.

Brian swiveled when he could finally pinpoint the exact area Emmett and Ted were watching. A beautiful blond was wrapping his body around Michael as he patted his back soothingly. “Who the fuck is that?!” The face was hard to place, but he was growing to recognize it. He couldn’t remember the name, though.

“That my dear Brian is Gilbert Rosen. One time hot-n-heavy boyfriend of Michael’s while you gallivanted for four years in higher learning. Motherfucker chewed on Michael’s heart and spit the thing right at his feet. Remember Teddy?” Emmett hoped Ted could help him use a few more choice words to explain Gil to Brian.

Ted lowered his head to sip at his beer. “Don’t remind me. Michael was in a funk for so long, I never thought we’d get him out of it. I’d like to take the prick out and show him a thing or two. Damn, but he still looks amazing!”

“I wonder what he’s doing with Michael?” Emmett scrunched his face up in worry.

“Why don’t I find out for you? If you don’t see us in fifteen minutes, you’ll know that we’ve left without you.” Brian was off to discover out what the hell was wrong with Michael.

Ted two-finger saluted Brian from his temple. “Will do, Sarge! I’ll take care of the troops on this end.”

Emmett kept an eye on Brian and Michael, curious to find out what would happen next. “Should we even bother waiting? You don’t think they’d actually be here later to go home with us, do you?”

“Brian looked pissed.”

“Michael’s gonna get a real hard spanking.”

“I think there’s a method to his madness.”

“Michael? That manipulative?”

“Em, you know what’s gonna happen. The same thing that’s been going on for years. The Brian and Mikey Show. They’ll go home and Michael will have the worst hard-on in years and no sign of release. He’ll comfort Brian, pet him into sol

 

~~TBC... 


	3. Chapter 3

“I’m so sorry, Mike. About everything.” Gil pulled away, creating a distance this time, as he used the bar napkin to wipe at the wetness on his cheeks. “I’ve been nothing but a crybaby these past weeks. I haven’t cried this much since I was a child.”

I had brought us back over to the railing, away from the crowds of men. “Better late then never. Had to happen some time.” I leaned an arm along the balcony railing. I got a thrill when Gil thought he had to step away from me. Like I was too tempting to resist.

“Saying the words out loud, with the way you look, the way you’re acting... I can’t help but wish things had been different. If I hadn’t been such a coward, such an asshole, leaving you the way I did, I would have been lucky to at least have called you a friend. I lost out on that privilege.”

Too bad for you. “Can’t dwell on that for too long, Gil. I hope you’ll take whatever I’ve said here to heart. Try to mend your ways. No matter how our lives have changed, whether we’ve matured or not, we’re still those sad losers trying to be the better man. We can’t ever go back for anything. We’re right where we need to be.”

“Ever the philosopher. Eh, Mike? I liked that about you. Always made things easier to deal with.”

“I get that from all the men in my life. My one redeeming quality.” I smiled a genuine grin as I peered down at the dance floor. I could no longer spot Brian. Shit! As I was about to enjoy myself more in Gil’s regret, two arms encircled me from behind as cool lips went to kiss my neck. The scent triggered a knee jerk reaction from my body. God, I wanted this moment to be real. Brian and I as a couple.

“Hey, beautiful! I wondered where you got off to.” Brian ran the side of his cheek against Michael’s sweet scented gelled hair. The way he was feeling right now, he could “do” Michael in front of all these men. Preferably as this Gil character watched. He tried to recall if their relationship had gone deeper then Michael was willing to admit. While in college, Michael had dated Gil and quickly moved in with him. He almost thought it might have been the awkward straining years of their own friendship when Michael became infatuated. When Brian wasn’t there for Michael, Gil had replaced him and apparently hadn’t done a very good job. The year following college graduation, Brian had learned of Gil and what had occurred. What Michael had gone through without him. He hated knowing that pain had infiltrated Michael’s naive mind and warped his fragile heart, while he had been partying in college with Lindsay. Brian was about to go in for a steamy, French kiss with Michael, angling his head just as he caught sight of Gil’s intense stare. “Oh... hello...”

I knew what Brian was up to and I liked his ease at shocking Gil. Probably because Gil would know exactly who I had by my side. Brian’s reputation was legendary. No one ever forgot his face, or the other parts of him that men kept secret. “Brian, this is Gil Rosen. Gil, this is Bri-...” I had my answer as Gil took Brian’s smoothly offered hand.

“Kinney. Brian Kinney, right?” The question had been asked out of respect.

“Yeah. So Mikey,... you ready to go?” Brian feigned his usual disinterest as he pulled himself around, pushing Michael completely flat over the railing. “You’re incredible.” He stretched an arm on each side of Michael, caging him. He fluttered his lips over every exposed area of flesh available to the eye. “I can’t get enough of you. I wanna go home... and fuck you... all night long...” Brian knew Gil still remained near them. He could see the blond out of the corner of his eye. “Can we help you with something?”

Gil immediately knew when he was being dismissed. Michael had kept a secret from him, or he was a good liar. He was with someone. The person who happened to snag Michael was Brian Kinney. He wondered if the Casanova of Babylon knew what kind of nuclear bomb he had in his hands. When Gil had been with Michael, it was easy to tell his inexperience. He was a quick learner and once he became familiar with his companion’s likes and dislikes in bed the adventure could begin. Michael had surpassed even the most experienced lovers in Gil’s sexual history. “I’ll see you around, Mike.” He gave a small wave as he walked away to lose himself in the crowds of sweating bodies.

I placed my elbows on the pole to gaze into Brian’s hypnotic eyes. Odd that he had felt tense for a few minutes. Gil had meant nothing, but he was emotionally drained. “You feel better?”

“Of course. Bad guy’s gone. And I got you all to myself... finally.” Brian bent to nuzzle the open skin near the area behind Michael’s ear, but something irked him as he smelled the primal needs emanating off of Michael. “Do you mind explaining to me what the fuck you thought that would accomplish?”

I was more upset with myself then at Brian. I didn’t need him to tell me what a fool I looked like. “What did you think you were doing? Coming to my rescue? I’m a big boy now, you know?”

Brian’s eyebrows went up in shock. “Really? From my vantage point it looked like the Ex had you right where he wanted you. Why did you even start talking with him? You wanted him to break your heart some more?”

“What I do with my life is my own fucking problem! I don’t think...”

“Exactly!”

“He was feeling down and lonely...”

“Of his own doing, most likely. Why do you care?”

“I don’t!” I screamed into Brian’s face.

“You could have fooled me!” Brian spit back in similar rage.

I crinkled my brow in wondering why this was pissing Brian off so much. “Gil’s not been on my mind since...” I tried to come up with a reasonable length of time.

“Yeah, your mind, but how long out of your heart?” Brian didn’t have to yell this time. Instead he spoke softly into Michael’s ear, expecting some kind of reaction other then what he got. Fucking tears! Shit, they were pooling right in his beautiful, hush puppy eyes like diamonds caught in the sunlight. “No! No! No! Michael...” Brian quickly grabbed for Michael’s face in his hands, plastering his lips to Michael’s trembling mouth. He wanted to begin the apology right. He knew he could be a terrible bastard to those he cared about. He really should watch his words, knowing how sensitive Michael could be all too often.

I responded to his harsh kissing by attempting to open his mouth with the invasion of my tongue. The frantic groping coupled with the meshing of our lips created quite a stir in us and the surrounding men watching. I had choked. Brian had caught my truth without me telling him a word. There was that damn word again. Heart. My downfall. Big as a fucking skyscraper. I wore mine on my sleeve like a merit badge. Explains how I could fall in love, with any man, at the drop of a hat. Most especially with the one who was trying to attach himself to me by the mouth. My hard-on flexed through my jeans as I soaked up his attention. I wanted to go further tonight, with him.

Seeing and being in the same space as Gil had brought me back to that crummy level of “What have I accomplished in my life?” Had I achieved everything I wanted, despite the heartache of losing a boyfriend, or was I stale and not really going anywhere? Stuck in a rut. Where did I fit? Funny how being wrapped in Brian’s clasp was making my place pretty easy to figure out. I managed to sneak my tongue back out to skim the outline of Brian’s thickening lower lip. I wanted to gain entrance into the warmth again, but found if I went any further we’d have each other’s shirts off and go at it on the floor. I didn’t want an audience. “I can’t believe this. If I am reading you right, I’d say you were jealous.” My hot breath blew across Brian’s perspiring face. He had to shut his eyes in the throws of pent up sexual tension brewing.

Their foreheads fell against one another. “What? How do you figure that?” Brian furrowed his brow in puzzlement.

“Your frustration over Gil.”

Brian shook his head doubting Michael’s theory. “Flimsy proof. We’re friends, Michael. We’ve been there for one another through tough times. Gilbert’s deceit tore you to pieces and turned your insides to mush. You wouldn’t let me near you. I couldn’t get inside your head. I had to hear what happened from Ted and Emmett.”

I couldn’t stop my hands from running over Brian’s silk shirt. I loved the way the material felt over his moist skin. “Can I ask you one question?”

Brian shrugged totally lost in Michael’s massage. “What?”

“What did you do to him?” I don’t know what made me feel like I knew he had messed with Gil, but the intense hatred I saw coming off him, when Gil had been around, was a little insight.

Brian lifted his head and looked down at Michael. “How did you know?”

I patted his shoulder in showing he was more vocal about his true feelings even when he didn’t think he was doing a thing. “I do... isn’t that enough?”

“You really want to know?”

“I asked, didn’t I?”

Brian looked sheepishly at Michael, wondering what he could fully admit to doing without pissing him off. “Promise not to hate me once you know?”

“Hate you?” My pupils dilated boring into his wide hazel eyes. “If it should happen, I’d be moderately pissed. I’d never hate you. But then, I gotta know why that would matter to you?”

Brian turned his head away, for a fraction, at the unjust accusation. “Please don’t say things like that.”

I regretted the words once they had slipped out. The down trodden look to Brian’s expression was too telling and broke my heart. I had bruised his ego. Wow! Who knew he could be that sensitive. “I’m sorry.” I shaped my hands around the growing stubble, placing a tender kiss at the side of his mouth. I rubbed at the droplets of sweat dripping down his skin. God, he was gorgeous and breathtaking all in one second. Any exposed inch of flesh had a tiny bit of sheen to the texture that was distracting. I bit down on my tongue in the anticipation of being allowed to lick that particular surface later. I should avert my gaze from his lips. Damn!

“I had called from the office. I was interning, for Ryder, at the agency. You’d been sent home early because you’d just pulled an all nighter in the stockroom. Emmett and Ted had just put you to bed. I got that they didn’t like me much since they both wanted to rip me a new one for wanting to disturb your precious nap. Then Emmett remarked about you not needing my bullshit on top of everything that had happened at the Big Q. You’d been fending off Fat Marley and some tightwad of a District Manager.”

I knew just what Brian was talking about. “Oh! Yeah! Right! Rick Marland. Cocksucker never liked me. Wanted me fired, but the manager liked my hard-working ethics too much. Marland thought I was just kissin’ ass since there was a new assistant manager position opening up. I had barely been there three months and they thought I was trying to show off. What they didn’t know was I needed the extra shifts for Ma and Uncle Vic, plus it got me out of having to help at the Diner. She got pissy and resentful, but once she knew I could use my employee discount to buy her supplies and groceries, the Big Q was the best place on Earth.” I recalled those first few days in the stockroom. I was the new fresh meat for the cashiers. The new cute single guy lifting boxes and stocking shelves for the Fair Maidens of the Aisles. “Fat Marley started to ask questions about my social life. Inviting me out to breeder bars for rounds of beer and bar nuts. Things like, did I have a girlfriend?... what was my ‘type’? Her niece was coming down that summer and she was looking for someone interesting to show her around town. She kept dragging out this photo for me to look at. ‘One look, Mike. You wouldn’t believe how much she’s changed!’. Shit! That entire day was a fuckin’ nightmare!” I rubbed a hand over my face, recalling those awful days.

“You’re such a good, decent homosexual, Mikey.” Brian teased with a chuck under Michael’s chin.

“Shut! Up!” I hated when Brian reamed me out for hiding my sexuality.

“So... as I was saying... I about hung up on Emmett, when he got nasty and said something to the effect of weren’t ‘they’, he and Ted, good enough to take out. I folded ‘cause I missed you and knew you’d been wanting your friends and I to get along. You’d been avoiding me, but I knew I wasn’t at fault. I think Em just had his final chat with Gilbert. 'Who?', I asked. They both were so tired of your moping that they caved right in front of my eyes. I got their side of the story that night at Woody’s. What pissed me off the most was that you’d never said a word. For months. Why, Mikey? Why so secretive?” Brian was interested to know this fact after all these years. Gil had never been discussed between them. He had fallen away into the mist of the past.

This was a conversation I had hoped to avoid until we were old and retired. Sitting back in our rocking chairs, milking some good brew and reminiscing about our pasts, loves and history. I shrugged feeling slightly unnerved to admit what happened. How badly I’d been duped and fooled. For a man who had perfected hiding his emotions well, I only figured Brian would let the explanations to fall away. Would he even try to understand what had gone on with Gil? I didn’t know if I could handle being labeled pathetic, yet again, in his eyes. I declared that I wouldn’t reveal too much until I knew I had a piece of him that I had always wanted. I couldn’t trust myself not to feel powerless as Brian berated my stupidity at thinking a monogamous relationship was possible for gay men. “Finish your story, please.”

Brian watched the emotions play over Michael’s face. There was some truth he fought to reveal. He was instantly perturbed, but mostly because there was an aspect of Michael that would remain a mystery. A part of Michael’s pain that he couldn’t touch. “We saw him, on the street, across from Babylon. Like a fucking hustler.” Michael’s eyes widened in shock as Brian went on. “He was half-baked on something. E, Special K, crystal... who knows. Emmett spotted him first. Thought he’d do some ape-shit Tae Kwon Do/Bruce Lee move on him. I told them if they couldn’t find me in five minutes to leave without me. I tossed the keys to Ted. I’d find a way to pick up the Jeep. Gil was leaning through some prick’s Beamer passenger window. His ass shaking like a go-go boy. The offer was pretty clear. I tugged him out, threw a fifty to the jerk off and told him that Gil was mine.”

I needed to know for my own sanity. “Was he?” As Brian shook his head from side to side, I scraped my knuckles over his cheeks silently appreciating his quiet honesty.

Brian turned his head to press his lips to Michael’s palms, kissing the soft skin. He grabbed for both of Michael’s hands to settle them at their sides as he went to explain further. “I got off on him not knowing who I was, but me knowing who he was and what he’d done. Even if he’d known anything, he was too snowed to think on his own. I flagged for a cab, he rattled off some fancy address.”

I closed my eyes to look away. “Laurence Dean Walker, Jr.’s suite supplied for Gil in case of emergencies.” I was more disgusted in knowing that piece of information, because for months Gil was made to suffer my deplorable simple apartment. I wondered if he was slumming to play fun at having to sacrifice himself to the harsher, cruel side of middle class life. I had thought our little world had been sweet, comfortable and enough. Gil had only been wasting his time before Laurence would take him back. Rat bastard!

“Gil thought I was another John. He took my frustrations at having to fend him off as a sign I liked rough sex. Once I told him who I was here for,... you... he quickly needed to use the bathroom. I followed him in pursuit, cramming his head into the toilet. He screamed and cried bloody murder. I think he figured you had found some ‘hood’ to come rough him up. He kept spewing empty, useless apologies. I told him I was the wrong person to be saying this to.” Brian chuckled at the images he remembered of that night. Had he really looked that impressive? Like a mafia thug... the Queer Mafia? “Before I punched him out, I thought about you. I dropped that idea and shoved him into the shower, fully clothed. He needed to appreciate being able to breathe without a broken nose or cracked ribs. I told him to shower. He stank like a homeless piece of shit. I walked out of the bathroom to order room service. I think I got every expensive item I could find, all courtesy of Laurence D. Walker, Jr. Once he changed clothes, sobered up a bit, I waited outside to have a talk with him. You were off limits. He wasn’t to bother you, ever again. Think it worked?” Brian released Michael’s hands to surround his trim waist, pulling Michael flush with his chest.

I lifted my arms to encircle Brian’s neck, hanging off his quiet strength. “You probably left a few minor details out. Cleaned up all the nastier, dirtier bits. I thank you for looking out, but it wasn’t necessary. I understand the sentiment it was meant for... my swift kick in the ass.”

Brian’s arms encircled Michael’s waist to bring him higher up his torso. “You deserved worse. Making me babysit your boys. I tried dealing with them together, but they ganged up on me. I went out with them separately. We all agreed what a failure the attempts were. They weren’t you.”

“They can’t remember the Rules. I know you need to be the Alpha Male for the evening. They’ll never be able to grasp your primal beauty, like I do. I can cope, they can’t.

Brian felt the flush to his already heated skin. “Thanks for the compliment, Mikey. Good for my ego.”

“Nothing else?” I teased lightly as I trailed my hands down, from around his neck, to the span of his shoulders, over his deeply, breathing chest, rubbing the trim flanks as I sneaked my hands down inside, over his naked backside. No underwear, per usual. The cool thing about Brian was that he’d experienced so much sex in his life that anything was game for him. You just had to be careful not to overload the “act” with too much emotion, or you’d lose him.

Suddenly, Brian’s expression became quiet and somber. He was trying to ignore the hands clinching his ass cheeks. He was in and out of deep thought. “I won’t do anything with you here, Mikey.” Michael brushed their enlarged groins together. Brian sucked in a hurried breath. “Except kiss you very thoroughly.” He swung down to bite at Michael’s full lips, but Michael diverted his head.

“Mmm, really? I don’t even get an honorary ‘quickie’ in Babylon’s backroom?”

Brian kept one arm wrapped about Michael’s waist as he hefted him up, swinging him around in the opposite direction. “What we have... is too good for the backroom. I wanna take you somewhere more private. We need to finish what was started last night.”

“This morning, thank you very much!” I had to clarify with Brian so he realized how much time had passed. I held on tightly as Brian brought me half over his shoulder, in a fireman’s carry.

“I stand corrected.” Brian smacked Michael’s exposed backside, which caused Michael to let out a yelp. “I’m taking you to the loft. Do you mind?”

Uh, wha-? Was this actually happening? Brian Kinney asking permission? I felt six-feet tall. Queen of the World. “Can we find Em and Ted before we take off? Seems awfully rude to leave them here.” What was in store for me at Brian’s loft?

“I already warned them. And isn’t it a good thing we all came in separate cars?” Brian paused in his intended trek across the floor. Michael squirmed to be set back down. A fairly profound thought was coming over Brian. He wondered if Michael would want him to share. Nah! He’d mention it later. They needed to get out of this musty smelling club.

**************************************************************

Brian was fine as he approached where he had parked the Jeep. He’d been momentarily split from Michael. An old friend stopped Michael in his path along the street. Climbing in with keys already discovered, Brian sat behind the wheel. His hands were beginning to shake. Christ! What the hell?! The keys jangled to the floor in an unexpected shock of feeling. What... was wrong with him? His stomach felt tight and jumbled, like he’d eaten tainted food.

Was he nervous about bringing Michael back to the loft? Like Brian would have to impress Michael. He felt like throwing up right in his lap. Even though the night air was cool on Brian’s face, he was burning up. He flicked on the air conditioning, full blast, as he leaned forward to rest his forehead on the steering wheel.

I had finally been able to break away from Stephen Langley, an old friend who usually wanted to chatter way too long, catching up on EVERYTHING since the last time you saw him. An added spring to my step, anticipating what was waiting for me, I said a quick goodbye, escaping toward the running Jeep. What met me, as I walked up, was scaring the hell out of me. Brian slumped over the wheel. What had happened in those few minutes apart? “Are you all right, Bri?” I poked my head through the open window, tugging open the door. I climbed in to sit in the passenger seat.

Brian felt the gentle touch to the hairline at the back of his neck. “Just dandy. Need a few more seconds down here, though.” He inhaled the freezing breeze through his flaring nostrils.

“Did you get this batch from Anita, again?” I had witnessed him coming down from highs before, but this one was unusual. Brian looked about one choke away from puking his guts out.

Brian wasn’t hurt by Michael’s assumptions. He had a few bad habits. “No. I’m avoiding ‘Nita like the plague. Not since that night...” Brian realized, before he spoke, that he hadn’t let his thought mull in his head awhile. He should have shut up sooner. He was about to mention he hadn’t bought anything from Anita since that night with Justin.

“What night?”

“Never mind.” Brian couldn’t finish in front of Michael.

“Do you need me to drive?” I continued to massage the nape of Brian’s neck as he rambled on trying to ease the discomfort. “You could lay down, as best you can, in the back. I’ll take us home.” I wasn’t angry or upset that the night might end up a disaster. If anything, I did like taking care of Brian.

“Nah! I’m good now!” Brian lifted his head which caused Michael to drop his hand, placing it back on his own thigh. He craved that touch, badly enough, he frantically clasped the fingers back, pulling them toward him. Placing a tender peck to Michael’s skin, Brian brought the hand up to his burning cheek.

“God, Bri! You’re hot!” I blurted the words out before I knew what I had said.

“Why thank you, Mikey.” Brian saw that Michael was about to speak, to clear the air, but he interrupted to prevent him. “I’m kidding. I know what you meant.”

“Are you sure you’ll be okay to drive?” I knew he’d be fine, but there was something different about his reaction this time. His cocky grin told me everything would be just... to his liking.

******************************************************

Brian, for the life of him, never knew how he got the Jeep from point A to point B. Without any major traffic casualties. All he could remember was parking in his usual spot, in front of the loft. He had to let go of Michael’s hand to exit. He didn’t like missing the warm contact for too long. As Brian went to open his door, it was pulled from his fingers. There Michael stood to help out, if needed.

“Do you feel faint or anything? Dizzy?” I placed my hand out, palm up, like a gentleman would have done to escort his woman from the car. I wanted Brian to feel safe... treasured and cared for. I wasn’t solely interested in him for the sex, but it was a great bonus.

Brian tried to make his mouth form the word “No.” as his legs crumbled right under him. He grabbed for Michael afraid he’d fall right through the Earth. As always, those shockingly strong arms were there to catch him. He had felt a similar feeling the night Gus was born. All the wasted years of his life coming into focus. Fear had taken him over as he climbed to that hospital roof ledge. Playing on the cusp of Life/Death, hoping to drive every negative emotion out. Even now, there was a tiny “itch”, buried deep within, trying to surface, telling him that changes like these were worth so much more. Just like his Sonnyboy.

I eyeballed Brian as he nearly collapsed in my arms. For such a large man, he was actually quite weightless. I couldn’t help being reminded that this was the same look I’d gotten the night Gus was born. Almost a “Is this why I am here?”. Brian’s penchant for knocking on Death’s door seemed empty and pitiful. I had no way of knowing what to say to him to make him desire to be earthbound... always a part of my life... somewhere beside me. When we were younger things were much simpler. I had seemed to be enough. Too much maturing and growing apart taught us the harsher side to many longtime friendships. Changes. Inside and out. I no longer had a reply for Brian to tell him that I was enough, if he wanted me. And, really, if I did ask... would Brian answer me truthfully?

Brian had no recourse but to pull Michael to him. He swooped down to plaster their quivering lips together. They both were in need of some reassurance that this was REALLY happening. Brian shaped Michael’s head in his hands as he suckled from his most favorite body part on Michael. Michael reached up his hands to wrap around Brian’s wrists, hanging off of them. The radiating warmth between them was suddenly disturbed by a swift chilled breeze.

I was chattering my teeth as the wind whipped up my clothes. “Can we take this inside? Please.”

**********************************

Brian chuckled at Michael’s passion filled eyes at half mast begging him to follow his request. “I thought you’d never ask, Novotny.” Brian felt more capable of walking on his own as he dragged Michael behind him on the way into the building. He decided to take the elevator. He didn’t want to hinder being able to hold, touch and grope Michael as much as they could before they entered the loft. Something drastic was about to change in their relationship.

Brian plastered Michael to the wall, pressed the correct buttons, brought the gate down with one hand and sent the elevator up to the right floor. Rubbing Michael underneath his shirt, Brian took small bites out of the pale neck. Michael smoothed his hands back down to those glorious globes that felt pliable in his palms. Stupid grins and heavy breathing, and petting, filtered between them as they relaxed against the lining cage of the elevator. Once stopped, Brian and Michael giggled at the jarring that separated their skin a few inches. Flipping them over, so now Brian was on the wall, this brought them closer to open the gate up. Like a blind man with perfect eyesight, Brian lifted the gates out of their way.

Brian had stepped out before me, nearly tripping me on his way by. I was paying close attention to what looked very wrong with the front door of the loft. I tugged on his shirt, grabbing underneath, touching bare, heated flesh.

“Wha-?” Brian looked back at Michael wondering who could be inside. The door was open slightly, allowing the noises from inside to echo out in the hall. Faint clangs, and bangs, were coming from the small kitchenette. Brian hadn’t remembered inviting anyone over. He tightened his body prepared for whatever would greet them. He pushed Michael behind him, to protect him. Michael’s grip moved to the belt loop, almost pulling the pants down. Poor guy wasn’t aware of his strength when he was scared. The closer Brian got to the door an idea formed of what was happening. Sounds of a baby crying and a second voice, sing-songing, attempting to ease the noise level. Gus? What would he be doing here... and with whom? Reaching out a tentative hand, Brian slid the door open completely, allowing Michael and him a better view of the scene awaiting. Baby paraphernalia cluttered with all the neoclassical, art deco, IKEA-esque furniture made for an interesting blend.

“WHAT IN THE HELL IS GOING ON?!” Brian stepped over the threshold expecting a really good explanation. A full story of why his son was here and not with the Mommies.

~~TBC...


	4. Chapter 4

Two innocent faces stood frozen in the kitchen. One holding Gus, the other shuffling off one of the breakfast bar stools. They both looked at one another, mouths agape, as they tried to think of what to say to explain the situation. 

“Justin?”

“Ma?”

Michael and Brian had shouted their words at the same time. They turned to gaze fondly at each other as tiny smiles spread across their blemished and swollen lips. They looked back at their guilty parties.

Debbie Novotny, Michael’s mother, decided to speak up first. “Look, Gus. Look who finally chose to show his face.” She shuffled along the mosaic tiles in her pink, fluffy slippers. “Please. Take him, Brian. I have done everything I can think of to settle him down. Nothin’ seems to work with the little bugger.” She appeared like she’d been woken up from a deep sleep.

Brian moved to quickly pick up his son as Debbie swung him out and away from her body. He could see Gus plopping down on the floor without her even caring one bit. She looked that tired. Gus fit naturally, in the crook of Brian’s arm. He quieted down in an instant. Gus had been so exhausted by his earlier escapades, his tiny head fell to Brian’s shoulder, rolling right up against Brian’s neck. Man, the kid was on fire! The loud raging tears, from before, had turned into soft muffles against the costly silk shirt Brian was wearing. “Hey, Sonnyboy!” Brian jostled Gus, barely enough to make him cry again. “Mind telling Daddy what the fuck is going on?”

Debbie used a small towel to snap in Brian’s direction. “Don’t use that kind of language around a kid!” She reprimanded on her way toward the sink.

“At this age, Deb, all he really cares about is my tone of voice.” Brian was using his famous Peter Pan voice. “As long as I keep my voice at this level, he’ll be fine . . . and I can say whatever the hell I want. Besides, who’s more willing to tell me the truth? Surely, not you two?” He was still waiting for the excuse.

This was where Justin cleared his throat. He was standing, hands tucked in his back pocket, prepared for anything Brian had to dish out. “Mel and Lindsay had to make an unexpected trip. I didn’t have time to ask questions. They called, asked if I’d watch Gus for a few hours. But they called again, around ten, to make sure you’d be able to watch Gus a little longer then thought. I said it was okay.” Justin hoped he’d done the right thing. Actually he had hoped that Brian would allow him to babysit. That would give him extra time to work on Brian. “I planned on watching Gus until you came home, but I’d forgotten you were going out... again. There’s a dinner for you in the refrigerator.”

“What do you mean, ‘Going out again?’ Don’t I always go out?” Brian wished Debbie and Michael would help him out in clearing whatever fantasies Justin had about them together. Damn! Looks like he was solo on this one. He moved to open the door to the fridge, looking at what lay inside. “Thanks for din-din, honey... but that still doesn’t explain why Little Miss Nosey Annie is standing in her PJs and slippers in the middle of my kitchen.”

“Around midnight, Gus wouldn’t stop crying. I couldn’t even get him to fall asleep. I had thought he was burning up with fever. I freaked. I called Debbie, who rushed over here. She was just looking for some baking soda, before you came in.” Justin hoped that would be enough for him to be cleared of any blame or misplaced anger. Hell, he hadn’t made Brian jerk-off in a cup. Why was Justin supposed to feel guilty for Brian sometimes having to watch Gus when Mel and Linds couldn’t?

“Planning on making a Gus souffle?” Brian chimed in sarcastically as he watched both Debbie and Justin look guilty. He just wanted to yank both their chains.

“Don’t be an asshole, Brian.” Debbie remarked as she leaned back against the counter. “He happens to be teething, is all. No need to worry. He’ll spike a temp all night, until he stops. That’s why he was crying. With Michael, I paced the floor for hours, almost three days straight. Gus ate a little, but not much . Michael could barely keep anything down his belly. He’d puke everything right back up or...”

I couldn’t believe my mother was choosing to divulge that personal information. “Okay, Ma! I don’t think anyone here wants to know me THAT well. The play-by-play of my bodily functions is not necessary.”

“Oh, hush, Michael. You were adorable at that age.”

“He still is, Debbie!” Brian walked back to pinch Michael’s chubby cheek bone. “What exactly was the baking soda for?”

“A home remedy compress. Helps soothe the teeth coming in.”

Walking around Debbie, Brian reopened the fridge. Way in the back was where the baking soda was kept handy. He knew Debbie would wonder why he even had the damn box in there. “I can be practical. Keeps the food fresh.” Brian placed the yellow box near Debbie’s elbow on the counter.

“Yeah. Whatever.” Debbie probably didn’t have too far to discover who had told him that fact. “Come on, Sunshine. Let’s you and I head on home.” She wandered about the loft, looking for her jacket, and purse, while patting herself down inspecting for car keys.

“What about the compress, Deb?” Justin sounded deeply wounded for all he’d done to cover for Brian’s ass.

“Look at him.” Debbie moved to run a fingernail over the pinkish cheek exposed. “He’s perfectly content right where he is. Daddy’s got him. Nothin’ can replace that kind of remedy. I’d hate to bother him since he’s doing exactly what we’ve been attempting all night.” She raised her sparkling eyes to Brian’s face, patting his stubbled, chiseled cheek in turn. “You owe us a dinner, Brian.”

“I make a mean reservation, Deb.”

Debbie tugged on the nearby earlobe. “Watch that mouth, kiddo.” She walked over to her son, bussed his cheek, wiping at the lipstick stain. “G’night, sweetie.” Debbie waited by the loft door for Justin to pick up his school bag and put on his sneakers. Shoving the young man out the door before her, Debbie turned to her other boys, watching them closely as she spoke. “Don’t stay up too late, boys.” For years, she had said that over and over, sending them to bed in Michael’s old room. Tonight felt different. This time she couldn’t come back, making sure they were actually asleep, and behaving. Debbie’s boys were grown men. Old enough to know right and wrong, but still young enough to know true emotional pain. She had to trust that they knew what they were doing. Believe in her love for them that they could handle the situation... and the possible fallout. The loft door slid shut as quietly as Debbie could shove it. Damn! What a heavy sucker!

Brian had caught Debbie’s “look” of desperation. Man, she could make a strong man crumble with one look. He remained standing in the middle of the tiny kitchen, Gus in one hand and the open baking soda box in the other. He was lost in where to go next. Brian turned, ducked to replace the baking soda back in the fridge, on the door shelves. He glanced up to make a glib remark to Michael, but found no one in his line of vision. “Michael?”

“What?” I popped up from the living room. I was on my knees in front of the couch, picking up toys, squeaky things and stuffed animals to chuck them back in the playpen.

“What are you doing?” Brian walked out of the kitchen, toward Michael, curious to what he was in the middle of messing with.

“Place is a pigsty, Brian. I thought I might pick up a little bit before either one of us, or the child, injures ourselves.”

“I didn’t invite you over to be my maid, Mikey. Although... the sight of you... on your knees... on my rug... well, makes me wish Gus weren’t asleep in my arms. Shit! I don’t expect you to feel obligated to babysit with me. I had no idea Linds would need me, springing the kid so suddenly.”

“I know, Bri. It’s the kind of thing one has to accept when you have a child. Your time is pretty much up in the air. Plans have a tendency to fall through at the last minute. You don’t need to make excuses with me. I don’t mind...”

“Would you shut up! Come over here! Right now!” Brian stood where he was, not moving any further, fearing he’d wake up Gus. His index finger directed Michael where to go.

I threw a stuffed giraffe over my shoulder. It landed with a squeak. I thought Brian might have gotten a cramp in his arm from holding his son awkwardly. But in reality, Brian liked the little man right where he was. I was the missing part of his inner circle. Brian wrapped his empty arm around my neck, pulling me into his embrace. I buried my face into Brian’s neck, inhaling his musk scent.

Brian had the two most integral parts of his life. One his past, one his future. The family he had craved as a child, right in the palms of his hands. These two people were, without a doubt, his breath and his life. He’d die for either of them.

“This is good, Brian.” I was laying my head opposite of Gus’s face. I reached out to rub my hand over his slouched back, actually not minding the baby scents wafting over. “What a cool opportunity you have with Gus. Now that he’s actually here, not part of someone’s imagination. I couldn’t be any prouder of you.”

“Didn’t take much to be involved. The cup I jerked off in had a more personal interest in the business then I did.”

“That’s bullshit and you know it!” I lifted my head punching Brian in his chest. “You talk big, Kimosabe, but you do so much more then you’re aware.”

“Hey! I’m not exactly everyone’s idea of perfect fatherhood material.”

“And Jack was? Well, too late to return him. You can’t deny he’s got your DNA for good looks.” I brushed a finger under Gus’s pouty chin of baby fat as I smiled and laughed along with Brian.

“Yeah, problem becomes that all his parents are so far down the hom-o-meter, he won’t be able to be anything but straight.” Brian felt Michael’s chuckle as he went back to burying his head in the available side of Brian’s neck. Michael planted a kiss to a vein pulsating under the honeyed skin and a shudder went through Brian’s spine. Shit! He almost dropped Gus, but squeezed instead of letting go. Michael knew the correct buttons to push with Brian. Brian couldn’t see having Gus in his arms, when all he wanted was to have them filled with Michael. “Come on. I’ll put Gus to bed for the night, then I’ll come help you clean up.”

Releasing Michael reluctantly, Brian moved to the portable playpen that would serve as Gus’s bed for his stay. On his knees, Brian lowered the side in order to place Gus gently on his back, surrounding him with plush toys and stuffed animals. There was small blanket that he pulled up over the exhausted, limp body. Gus fidgeted some, probably feeling the missing body warmth of Brian. Gus managed to settle down as Brian tenderly soothed the puffed belly. Brian brushed back the fuzz that went for hair at this age. Poor little man! Gus had been sweating up a storm, earlier, with his crying fits. Now, he looked at peace and dead to the world.

Brian shook himself out of his head swept up in the aura of his sleeping Sonnyboy. Why was Gus so fascinating to him? He was only a baby. Barely able to speak one word of English. Brian always found himself enraptured by the simple mannerisms and those wide innocent eyes, as if to catch some recognition of familiarity. Brian’s own childhood was foggy, riddled with such angst and misplaced anger. He couldn’t think of one single moment that Jack had said a kind word to him. He had vowed, if he had a son, things would be different.

Getting off his knees, Brian stood to help Michael finish. Surprisingly, with two people, working diligently, the loft appeared spic-n-span after only a few minutes. Feeling tired, from a long night out, then coming to the loft to do chores, Michael plopped down on the couch, his head laying against the back of the seat cushions. Brian eyed him cautiously, wondering if there was still some intention of moving into the bedroom. That long, pale neck was exposed as the Adam’s Apple took a deep swallow. Brian had watched that easy movement for years, but had never felt the sexual stimulations that it was creating in him. He figured that Michael had always felt that free with him. Uninhibited. Brian just hadn’t been paying attention. Oblivious to every action he made, because Michael didn’t see himself as appealing to other men, or the one he wanted most.

Brian felt that this was the moment where he could turn the page, in their longstanding relationship, or end the permanent thoughts clogging his mind, never speaking again. Hold on tightly or let go and allow Michael to fly out of range... forever lost. Was he strong enough? The question being did he love Michael enough to release him, to love other men, or did he want that love... the love that had always been there for him... as his very own?

“What are you doing... way over there?” I had wondered why Brian had been so quiet. Contemplative in one of the rolling chairs at his breakfast bar. I was looking at him upside down, my head tilted backwards to see him behind me.

“Nothing.” Brian pushed away from the counter area. The rolling chair seemed to find it’s own way to hit the back of the couch. He scooted so that his head hung over Michael’s upside down one. “Thinking, I guess.” He tentatively reached out to caress Michael’s ivory skin.

“Are you having second thoughts?” I couldn’t believe that Brian hadn’t kicked me out yet. The fact that I was still here was speaking loudly for me. Brian couldn’t let me go, just this second. I began to think what he would want to do with me. “You sure about this?”

“I wouldn’t be here, with you, if I wasn’t, Mikey.” Brian shook his head, snickering, as he rubbed his knuckles down the angled bone structure of Michael’s chin.

“I don’t want you to feel obligated to give me what I want. I’m not looking for favors.”

“Ah, Michael... tsk, tsk...” Brian attempted to gently kiss away Michael’s fears. “You’d be shocked to learn I’ve wanted this to happen, between us, as much as you have. I just wasn’t sure that we were both ready. Maybe, what I’ve been searching for... has always been right under my nose... all this time.” His face hovered over Michael’s features barely shadowing the tip of his nose to the sensitive skin.

“I had no idea you’d been looking.” I gulped a large lump in my throat. Was I about to hear the words I’d been dying for since I had begun to have certain deep feelings for Brian?

“Neither did I. Until yesterday to this morning and seeing you with Gilbert tonight.” Brian shook his head in utter disillusionment. He didn’t know where these words were coming from, but he had to say them. “I’m a possessive man, Mikey. When I see what is mine getting snagged by someone else, I get protective. I don’t ever want you to think you have to sink to the levels that Gilbert did to find love. You know I realized something tonight.”

“Yeah, I couldn’t help noticing the slight trouble in the car. What happened?” I decided to sit more comfortably on the couch. I tucked my legs under me, moving to hover over the back of the cushions. I reached out to caress Brian’s stubbled cheek. He bent his head, loving the way that we always fit so perfectly together.

“I had an epiphany.”

“Oh, really? Brian Kinney was lost, but now he’s found?”

“Whatever. I had ‘butterflies’ in my stomach. Over you.”

“Me?”

“I felt like puking in my lap.”

“Uh, that’s not an image I was gunning for, Brian.”

“I’m serious. This revelation happened in Babylon.” Brian crooked his arm along the back of the couch, leaning his head on his hand. “I like this. With you. Spending night after night... in your company. Almost like when we were younger, but Debbie kept getting in the way. I could get used to this.”

“Used to what?” I wasn’t sure what Brian was trying to convey.

“Domestication. I only remembered that baking soda fact because you shared it with me, a few years ago. I didn’t mind admitting I knew it.”

“How in the hell did we get back to the baking soda?”

“Easily. I’m trying to get to my point.”

“Sorry. Which is... ?”

Brian opened his mouth to say the words, but all he could do was stare intently at Michael’s darkening, chocolate irises. He let out a long breath. Damn, he had thought he was ready to say them! “Shit! Fuck!” Brian was frustrated with himself. His voice got stuck on the one thing he knew Michael needed, had always wanted from him.

“Hey now! It’s okay, Bri. Give yourself some time. This is new for you. Don’t crowd all your feelings into something you’re uncomfortable revealing. In time, it will come easily. You’ll be able to say it... like a sneeze.” I tried to touch Brian again, in order to soothe him with kisses, but he turned away.

Michael’s sentiments, and thoughtfulness, didn’t make the words flow any easier. Now, Brian was getting pissed off. “Thanks a bunch, Mikey. Now, if it happens to slip out, how the fuck are you gonna take me seriously?”

“Can’t we go back to what we’ve started? And deal with the formalities... later?”

Brian sat shocked, completely drained. “You still want... ?” At Michael’s slow nod, Brian scooted the chair back on the floor. “But I wanted it to be perfect for you.”

“What? The sex? When is sex in a relationship ever perfect?”

“I want you to have everything you’ve wanted... since... forever, it seems like.”

I finally knew what was upsetting Brian. I shut my eyes to his unneeded pain. No one knew what a true heart this man had inside of him. It could be forgiving and so gentle. I pushed off the couch, willing to be the instigator that would begin the new part of our relationship. “Do you trust me?”

“What kind of question is that?”

“Answer me?”

“Of course!” Brian looked at Michael as if he’d spoken some foreign language.

I held out my hand for him to take, palm up. “Then why won’t you believe me?”

Brian was stumped by Michael’s words. He placed his hand in Michael’s, willing to be led anywhere. A small grin to his luscious lips, Michael back walked his way toward the blue lit bedroom. He managed the two steps without tripping, once. “Tell me what you want... what you need from me, then, since I can’t seem to...” Michael placed a finger over Brian’s lips to stop the berating quickly.

“Promise not to be anything but the Brian Kinney I know exists. I don’t need the frilly words to know that you feel something. I’ve gotten to know those eyes of yours very well.”

“How about this part of me?” Brian engulfed Michael, up off the floor, bringing their engorged groins into contact. “I bet you know exactly what I’ve felt... here, too. ” For only a few seconds, Michael was taller then Brian, then he slid down his long frame.

“Good... ‘cause I feel it, too.” I clasped my hands over Brian’s ears pulling him toward me for a series of kisses that would drain him of any sense of his muscles, sans one in particular. I moved to brush up against the wood at the back of my calves to tell me I was near the bed. I slowly lowered us to the mattress. Brian quickly placed a hand above my head to make the drop smoother. My hands trailed down his arms to jump to the last button of his shirt. I began the undressing as he tucked a hand underneath my shirt, pulling the material up my chest. Soon we were both barechested.

Brian swiftly undid his leather pants, but he left them open, and undone half way down his hips, so he could press himself against Michael, in temptation of things to come. “I think I need a little help, Novotny.” He continued to bite at Michael, as the pants slowly were pulled down his thighs and his lower legs to fall off his bare feet. Trailing his lips down the pale skin, along Michael’s upper chest, paying close attention to the puckered nipples. He gave each individual dime sized shape at least more licks, and sucks, then the Doc had. He growled in ecstasy to know that David had so many more advantages over him. Brian wanted Michael to be unable to recall that other men even existed in his past. He grabbed for both of Michael’s hands thrusting them up over his head.

I liked this forceful side of Brian, where I knew I would be safe under his care. Despite his penchant for one night stands, Brian Kinney knew how to pleasure a man. I wasn’t about ready to let my moment slip by. I let him lead the way. I bucked underneath him, showing him he could undress me further, if that was his next step. I was prepared for anything. The pants came off just as easily as his had and were thrown across the room. I, unfortunately, was the perpetual boy scout. I always had on clean under shorts. Those lips went right from nipple to crotch area in ten seconds flat. Someone was a little eager! The next piece of clothing to come off, and last one, was my shorts. They went the way of the pants. Brian wrapped an arm under my body to lift me up further to the head of the bed, near the pillows. I flipped over, on my stomach, hoping that Brian would know what I wanted. That was what was most spectacular about us. No words were needed.

“Shut your eyes, Mikey. Just feel.” Brian kissed the nape of Michael’s neck as he sent his mouth to follow the line of sweat pooling down the sloped spine. He moved to straddle Michael, over his backside. Splaying both hands over Michael’s shoulder blades, Brian massaged the pliant skin. He ended at the dip of the lumbar spine to the shape of Michael’s cute bubble butt. He cupped the perfect globes, massaging them in circles. He sent his long tongue to lick down the crack, finding that Michael was very ticklish back here. He added his laughter with Michael’s infectious one. Never had he thought that silliness would ever enter his bedroom, but then again... look who was in the bed.

An idea suddenly came to Brian’s mind. “Hold that thought, Mikey! I’ll be back!”

I didn’t know what to think as Brian ran naked from the bedroom. I watched him over my shoulder, pulling a plush pillow under my head to enjoy the display of beautiful flesh. Was Brian trying to create a “mood”? Was that why he was near the stereo? He began a series of three CDs that sounded like music from Babylon, but he plugged in a set of headphones. Placing them over his own ears, Brian played with the volume level, until he found the right decibel. He then moved to hover over Gus’s playpen, reaching down to place them over his son’s delicate ears. He was cracking himself up at his own innovative thought as he ran back in, feeling the chill of the room. I eyed him as he moved to the night stand to pick out condoms and lubricant.

“Sorry. I didn’t know if you were a screamer or not.” Brian returned to settle behind Michael, matching his long torso with Michael.

I snickered at Brian’s wild assumptions. “Why do you think I grabbed the pillow?” I demonstrated for him the soundproofing that simple cotton could give.

“Well, at least we’re both thinking on the same wavelength. I appreciate the thoughtfulness to Gus.” Brian had spread lube on two of his fingers. He sent the first one to test the waters with Michael’s tight opening.

“Not... a problem... Ah! Shit!” Michael dipped his head to hit the pillow.

“How’s that?” Brian kissed Michael’s shoulder, hoping he wasn’t hurting him too much.

“Feels... so good!” I wanted to tell him that he could go further, but the decision was made to increase the number of fingers as he pushed inside of me. “Fuck! Brian... yeah!... right there!” My face went into the pillow this time. I couldn’t take the chance I’d say something I regretted. Pillows and I went way back. I had talked to my own childhood bed pillows way too often.

Brian massaged Michael’s prostate to the point where he knew Michael would be hanging just off the edge. Reaching under Michael’s abdomen, Brian discovered that Michael was as hard as he was and at the point of orgasm. He quickly sheathed himself in the condom, wanting to keep a steady rhythm as he pumped into Michael and he jacked off Michael. Lifting one of Michael’s legs slightly higher then the other, he eased himself inside. Slowly penetrating the soft flesh that gave way at each thrust. What shocked him was as Michael cried out and moaned his release, one of Michael’s hands wandered down to help Brian with the slow ministrations on his own cock. Brian’s forehead fell to the slope of Michael’s spine. “Wait! Wait!” This didn’t need to be rushed or hurried.

They were now one full unit. The energy swallowing them whole was a little too encompassing for one to manage alone. They needed a minute to deep breathe and begin again.

“Are you okay?” I reached up a hand to touch Brian’s cheek near my shoulder. “You scared me.”

Brian kissed the flesh under his lips, licking at the salty sweat. As Michael relaxed, Brian’s dick slipped further in. “I’m fine. You’re just fantastically tight, Mikey. I almost came right when I entered you. That just wasn’t my idea of fun. I’m not a one trick pony.”

“Neither am I. I’d apologize, but from the sound of your voice. This problem of mine is a good thing.”

“A fuckin’ very good thing. I can’t believe no one’s ever told you this before.”

“Maybe they have.” I shrugged feeling Brian begin a slow grind. “I just never heard them.”

Through his choking voice of complete fulfillment, Brian started his steady rhythm again. “I’m not surprised. Good, god... can you feel me?” He pumped as hard and deep as he could.

“YES!” Michael arched his backside toward Brian to allow for better maneuvering. “Fuck me! Harder!”

“Mikey!”

“Jesus! Brian... are you almost there?” I said had folded my pillow up so tight I could no longer use it to protect my mouth.

“Yeah!” A few more solid thrusts and Brian was moving to help Michael near his own orgasm. “We’re gonna do this as perfectly as we can, Mikey.”

“Okay!” I squealed out as I began to figure he wanted us to bring each other to the pinnacle of release. Brian grinded his pelvis against my backside and I thrust into our merged hands on my throbbing cock. I squeezed his fingers to show him I wanted his fist around me tighter. Within minutes we were lost in some other world. Brian ejaculated and thrust one final time to hit my prostate at the exact moment as I pretty much screamed out my own orgasm and let go of every inhibition I’d ever had. This was perfect, even without the words I so dearly wanted. I knew Brian could express himself more through sex then anything else. He was more amazing a lover then I had ever imagined him to be. I couldn’t tell him that. He’d never believe me. Instead, I flipped over onto my back. Brian quickly rid himself of the condom in a nearby trash can. He was still feeling the repercussions of the last orgasm as his head fell to rest above my right upper chest. I swiped at the moist hair line, kissing the wet forehead.

“Well...” I wasn’t looking for compliments, but something needed to be voiced.

“I’m fucking speechless, Mikey.” Brian was trying to settle his breathing. “I need to catch my breath.” As he rested against Michael’s erratically beating heart, Brian tucked his body around Michael's slim frame. “I think I came twice in a row. I’ve never known that to happen to me before.” He seemed totally amazed by the feat.

“Really?” And I couldn’t help but feel that was the best compliment Brian could have given me. Something I had given Brian that no other man could. “Good. I’m glad to hear that.” I wasn’t about to wipe the foolish grin off my face.

“Don’t gloat, Mikey. It’s not you.” They had created such heat between them, as their bodies cooled, they suddenly realized how cool the room was. Brian moved to reach for the light covering to place over them. “I don’t know about you, but I’m not exiting this bed tonight unless I have to. What about you?”

“I say it’s a good moment to contemplate calling in sick.” I snuggled back into a different position. This time I was laying over Brian’s chest, tucked around his body, our legs entangled.

“I like your way of thinking, Novotny.”

“I thought you would. We’ll make a day of it with Gus... you know after a long morning in bed...” I didn’t know what to say as it looked as if Brian was trying to feign sleep.

“Go to sleep, Mikey.” Brian wrapped his arms tightly about Michael’s solid torso. He hoped Michael would sense the quiet to mean to shut up. He was still slightly pissed he hadn’t been able to voice his feelings. Ones he knew he had for Michael. After tonight, they were going to look like a fool's plea. Why couldn’t he say them as easily as Michael could? He hoped by morning that things looked different.

The Dynamic Duo fell into an easy sleep with calm and comfort, never wanting to release the tight hold on each other even in their dreams.

  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*THE END 

 


End file.
